Where is Pinoy Pride? I’ll tell you where…

SOMEONE named Tess Underwood uploaded a question in “Yahoo! Answers” that’s very demeaning to Filipinos. Here’s a copy:

Here’s the actual page: CLICK THIS.

The problem with this entry is that if you Google “Pinoy Pride”, it comes out as the second item in the Google search list (right after the Pinoy Pride Network site).

This negative opinion has become the second reference material for Pinoy Pride searches on line.

Which is quite unfair to all Filipinos and the Philippines.

I got so pissed, I wanted to give my Yahoo answer but the page has closed.

Tess has accepted and gave a high rating to an answer that affirms her distorted beliefs (you can see it there).

So, I’ve decided to post my answer, my scanned thoughts, here.

I am proud to be a Filipino and I will try to answer ALL her opinions one by one to enlighten her on what being a Filipino is really about:

Opinion 1: Filipinos always brag to be part Chinese, part American, part Dutch, part Korean, part Japanese, part Spanish. I have yet to meet one that says they are proud to be….Filipino.

My answer: If you know about the rich history of the Filipinos, you would not even ask this question. Filipinos are part African, Indonesian, Malaysian, Chinese, Spanish, American, Japanese, Arab, Korean, Australian and European.

The original “Filipinos” were the dark-skinned Negritos who walked all the way from Africa when the Pangaea continent still existed (we still have some of these ethnic Filipinos in Subic; you also see them in Manila during Christmas). Next to come were the Indones (from Indonesia) who brought their culture and language to our land, that’s why we have a lot of similar customs and traditions with them (our ancient handwriting, a lot of Filipino words, the the musical instruments angklung and gamelan). Last were the Malays (from Malaysia) who brought the Muslim religion to Southern Philippines. Later the Chinese traders came, who passed in our islands to trade with the Indones and Malays. When we were colonized by Spain, they gave our islands the collective name “Islas Filipinas” and the island natives were called “Filipino” after King Philip of Spain. That’s why Rizal—who is Filipino—is also half-Chinese.

So, even before the Spaniards came in the 1500s, we have been a rich mixture of different races; that’s what makes us different. That’s why we are also one of the most beautiful races in the world. That’s why the Westerners, the Arabs and other Asian countries fall in love with our Pinay beauties, court them and later marry them for keeps. That’s also why we have the Fil-American-Arab-European-Korean-Japanese children who are all products of post WW II inter-racial marriages brought about by war/ tourism/business/jobs abroad.

Remember, these are very open-minded foreigners who have chosen to marry Pinays against the accepted norms of their own societies. So, it’s a sacrifice for both husband and wife; it’s also a bit confusing for us, the products of these unions. However,  we have to be proud of this fact—that being Filipino is being part of another race– that we were able to survive all those challenges in our history to produce a racial breed that is culturally, beautifully, intellectually, creatively mixed and diverse.

Only Nazis would strictly tolerate a society of pure breeds. And you should know how that idea ended.

Read up:  http://philippines-timeline.com/spanish.htm

Opinion 2: 100% of the ‘famous Filipino’ actors and models, are only 1/4th Filipino.

My answer: This is a baseless generalization. You need to give specific names of these “famous Filipinos” before you insinuate that your statements are factual. What is true in the context of Philippine show business today is that a lot of these “famous actors and models” use the term Filipino because they are trying to work in the Philippines as actors and models or would want to get a fan base in the Philippines. If they present themselves as foreigners, they might not get hired, because by then the Department of Foreign Affairs would require them a work permit which will cost them and their employers a lot of money. Certainly the common Pinoy Fan wouldn’t want to idolize them for being too-Hollywood. So, it’s not about Pinoy Pride; it’s more about show-Business. I guess if you think they don’t deserve to be called Filipinos, the best way for you to handle your personal baggage against them is to boycott whatever products or programmes they endorse. Otherwise just let them earn a living.

Here’s a better list of certified “famous Filipino” celebrities:

http://www.famousfilipino.com/content/view/263/138/

Opinion 3: All the products in the Philippines say “export quality”. That means it’s so good, it’s good for foreigners. Shouldn’t it say ‘Pinoy quality’?

My answer: If you are going to talk about products from the Philippines from a business perspective and you would want to successfully market that product internationally, the term “export quality” would be the best description. You need to use words that everybody in the world would understand so that they would buy your product. Also remember, most of these exports are produced and marketed in a free market system that involves plenty of sharing of ideas, raw materials and investments from our partner countries, so why should Pinoys take all the credit? You should think globally if you’re selling to a global market.

From  http://www.philexport.ph/philippines-economy

“The Philippines exports continue with its upward trend throughout 2012. While US and Japan have remained the country’s two largest export markets, China and ASEAN countries have grown in importance. Other key markets include Hong Kong, Germany, Netherlands, South Korea, France and India.”

Opinion 4: Almost all of the products have Japanese, Chinese, English, or Korean writing. Giving the impression that these products are exported. With the exception of San Miguel products, Philippines products ARE NOT exported. It is mere faux Japanese, and faux Chinese.

My answer: If these are “faux Japanese and faux Chinese”, then the manufacturers have just wasted a large amount of their printing budget. Do you think any businessman would spend for something that will not have any purpose? In advertising, the more text and colour you put in the label design the more production cost you incur. I think you should be happy when you see foreign words in the items you consume because it means you have been being given an opportunity to taste what the rest of the world are having. These are authentic products for export—usually they are production overruns (sobra). So, some of them end up in the local markets even if they’re not supposed to.

From http://www.foodexport.org/Resources/CountryProfileDetail.cfm?ItemNumber=1030

“The Philippines is fast becoming a regional staging area for foreign food manufacturers that seek to penetrate the lucrative East and South East Asian market for processed products. This country has been identified for the ability of its workforce to manufacture high quality, differentiated or niche-market, and high valued products using both domestic and duty-free imported raw materials.”

Opinion 5: Courtship, Filipino style: If Filipinos had pride, then why do the girls here scream and beg to be with any foreigner who happens to walk down the street? Why does everyone here offer their niece, daughter, sister, grand daughter, etc. for marriage to a total stranger, so long as he is foreign? Even if the girl is a teenager, and the foreigner is a 200 kilo, 73 year old in a wheelchair? Why do people offer their children for sex, as young as 5?

My answer: If you’re talking about prostitution and sex trade, why are you focussing only on Filipinos? This “system” is legal in 50% of all countries in the world. It is even illegal in the Philippines! Do not generalize that everyone in the Philippines does it. If you’re talking about our 101,833,938 Filipino citizens nationwide, how much of that number do you think “scream and beg to be with any foreigner who happens to walk down the street”?

Prostitution—the oldest profession in the world– is a common story in all countries where poverty is very high and strict traditions are followed. It’s even worst in Eastern Europe (with their economy going to the dumps). It’s been happening in the Arab world, Africa, India, Japan and China for centuries (with their arranged marriages to privileged men in exchange for land and cattle). Even the crack addicts in the United States are doing the same thing (most of the time they don’t even get married—they just sell sex, later to buy drugs). It’s not the country, its poverty. And there are a lot of poor people all over the world, not only in the Philippines, if no one has told you yet.

Read up:

http://prostitution.procon.org/view.resource.php?resourceID=000772#afghanistan

Opinion 6: If they have pride, then why do they charge dishonest prices at the wet market?

My answer: It’s not dishonest. It’s called price mark-ups. In the business of selling, you need capital to buy or create your product. To be able to make a profit out of that product you need to sell it at a price that is more than your capital. Some prices are intentionally high at wet markets because it’s also a common practice to haggle with the customer to come up with an acceptable price for both the vendor and the buyer. And yes, like all your previous assumptions, it does not only happen in the Philippines. If you think, its way overpriced, then go to the nearest police station or barangay hall or a DTI Office and have the vendor arrested.

Watch one man’s experience in Bali, INDONESIA:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLTfyjUk3mQ

Opinion 7: Where is the pride, when, if a foreigner goes out in public, everyone smiles, points, stares, and shouts at them. Tries to pawn off stolen goods, or over-priced goods. Or yells rude, inappropriate things?

My answer: Clearly you’ve never been to New York City, USA where illegal vendors, who are also irritating to the public is a big problem:

Click this source>> http://www.dnainfo.com/new-york/20120608/soho/city-should-overhaul-complex-street-vendor-laws-police-say

Or INDIA, where everyone in the market place “smiles, points, stares, and shouts…tries to pawn off stolen goods, or over-priced goods. Or yells rude, inappropriate things”.

Click this proof >> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDBoyX17QBM

Again—Not only in the Philippines!!!

Opinion 8: Finally, If the Philippine is so great, then why is it everyone’s dream to get out, and move to another country? The Philippines is a tiny nation, yet 50,000, FIFTY THOUSAND, migrate to the USA alone, PER YEAR. That’s just one nation. Let alone Australia, UK, Japan, etc. 2,500 Filipinos migrate out of their country-PER DAY. That’s over a MILLION per yer. If the Philippines is the best place on Earth, why leave?

My answer: Where did you get this stupid information? 50,000 people a year?! How? The Philippines is not even on the global list of countries with the highest migration rate. In Qatar, only 10% of their citizens are staying in their country to work. 90% of the Qataris are staying out of their country. Does that mean they don’t like being in their country?

Click this source:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_net_migration_rate

Do you know why were not on the list? It’s actually very hard for Filipinos to leave the country with all the paperwork alone (legal or otherwise), not to mention the enormous cost.  Migrating is very expensive. And do you know how hard it is for Filipinos to change citizenship abroad? If you speak to all the Filipinos who are now abroad, if given a choice, they would rather come back and die old in the Philippines. But why do the eager ones leave? It’s because we get higher salaries abroad. Why, because we Filipinos have a highly regarded international reputation as very hardworking, loyal and intelligent. We leave to work and get paid well, but surely we will be back home again.

Opinion 9: There. Only a few things to look at. I’m not racist, nor political. I just think it would be better if Filipinos said “okay, this place sucks, but…..”. Instead of making it seem like the paradise that it’s not.

I am really quite curious about this. ‘Pinoy Pride’ is something in-yo-face every day here, but where is it REALLY? Any constructive feedback? Salamat po!

My answer: If indeed you are Filipino (as you claim to be), and you love your country (as you seem to insinuate) then you should be proud of your country and your countrymen. We should always say WE ARE PROUD OF THE PHILIPPINES because in the end, even if you say “it sucks” it’s the only country we have. It’s the only home for the Filipinos. It’s the only paradise for Proud Filipinos.

Truth be told, you will never feel totally accepted anywhere else in the world except in your own country. You will never be treated as an equal by another race in their own country. Ask anyone who have been abroad.

Sad to say– you are racist, political and very ignorant.

But it’s not too late.

I hope I have helped you change your mind set about your country and your countrymen.

If I haven’t, then shame on you.

And everyone else who agree with you.
MABUHAY ANG PILIPINAS!

MABUHAY ANG MGA PILIPINO!

(aLJI, June 2012)

Hunyo 15, 2012. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation, WTF is GRAMMAR?!. Mag-iwan ng puna.

STRIP DART



NAALALA KO minsang nag-iinuman kami ng tropa at batung-bato na sa mga kuwentuhang paulit-ulit lang ang topic — may nag-suggest na maglaro kami ng kakaibang laro:

 STRIP DART.

 Simple lang ang rules na on-the-spot lang pinagkasunduan ng lahat:

  1. Iinom muna ng isang basong beer ang taong titira sa dart board.
  2. Tapos, babato ng tig-dalawang darts.
  3. Ia-add ang total points ng dalawang throws.
  4. One turn bawat player.
  5. Ang pinakamababang score pagkatapos ng isang round ng batuhan ay dapat mag-aalis ng isang saplot na nakasuot sa katawan.

Ala-una ito ng madaling araw. Nasa labas kami ng isang bahay. Sa isang garahe sa tabi ng kalyeng madalas daanan ng mga tao. Dahil puro lasing na, walang paki na pumayag ang lahat. Mga walo kaming tipsy na kasali sa ka-istupiduhang ito.

 Unang round: Unang bato ng darts, ‘yung mga mababa ang score, nagtanggalan na ng relo, singsing, kuwintas, cellphone at sapatos. Easy.  Umalingawngaw ang tawanan at alaskahan sa katahimikan ng gabing iyun.

 Round two: Next na inalis ng mga natalo ay t-shirts, medyas, sinturon. Ang tawanan ang napalitan ng halakhak.

 Pangatlong round: Titira na ang unang biktima na may pinakamababang iskor. Delikado ang lagay niya dahil halos hubad na siya at nakapantalon na lang– kaya ‘pag mababa ulit ang score niya, pantalon na ang susunod na matatanggal. Tawanan sa excitement ang mga naghihintay sa tira niya. Inalaska na siya nang todo.

At mahirap nga ang maging bobo sa dart.

Pagtapos ng round na ‘yun, siya na naman ang pinakamababa ang puntos. Lagot.

“Hubad naaaa! Hahaha!” sigawan ang lahat ng may mataas na iskor. Parang naging beerhouse na may illegal boldshow ang garahe.

 Susunod kaya si Low Scorer sa pinagkasunduan? Sa kanya nakasalalay ang tagumpay ng palaro. Kung aayaw siya, siguradong wala nang maghuhubad na susunod.

 Ang kanyang last words: “’Ta**-ina n’yo– ‘pag hindi kayo sumunod, yari kayo sa akin!”  sabay hubad ng kanyang kupas na jeans.

Halakhakan ang lahat sa pagkagulat!

Sumunod sa pinagkasunduan ang loko! Tahulan din ang mga aso sa labas na parang nakikitawa dahil sa hitsura ng kawawang talunan: Maluwag ang brief niya,  tabatchoy, mabalahibo na parang pinaghalong Al Tantay at Apeng Daldal ang dating.

Round four and five: Ewan kung dahil ba sa sobrang alcohol, lahat ay wiling-wili na naghuhubaran. Naka-underwear na lang ang players by this time.

Maginaw na ang hangin. Nanginginig na ang ilan sa lamig pero tawanan pa rin. Alaskahan tungkol sa mga bilbil sa tiyan, mga hindi pantay-pantay na kulay ng balat dahil sa sinag ng araw, mga nakatagong galis at mga parte ng katawang maraming balahibo kahit hindi dapat.

 Round six: May taong sumisigaw sa gate! “Tao poooo! Tao poooo!”

 Si Mang Cando, isa sa  pinakarespetadong lasenggo ng baranggay. Pagkatapos niyang mag-“Tao Po” bigla na lang siyang pumasok  sa gate gaya nang nakagawian niya tuwing naghahanap siya ng libreng alak.

Akala ni Mang Cando mga kumpare niya ‘yung mga nag-iinuman. Tatagay sana siya.

Napatigil si Mang Cando. Napatigil din kami.

Nagkatitigan ang lahat at nagtatanong sa isip: “Paano na?”

Nanlaki ang mga mata ni Mang Cando sa nakita niya.

Hindi na kami nakapag-damit.

Apat  na naka-brief.

At dalawang labas ang pwet.

Mga machong-lasing na nakangiti at nakatingin kay Mang Cando.

Hubad.

Puro kami lalaki.

“YAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!” nagsisigaw siyang tumakbo palabas ng gate.

 “Pu****-ina! Mga bakla! BAKLAAA!!! Patawarin kayooo!!!”

Malayo na siya dinig pa rin naming lahat ang kanyang takot na takot na pagsigaw.

 Nabalitaan namin, mula noong gabing ‘yun, hindi na muling uminom ng alak si Mang Cando.

 Hindi na rin kami … nag-darts.

Pero tuwing nakakasalubong namin si Mang Cando,

kinikindatan namin siya.

 Sabay tawa.

(LjI0508)

Pebrero 11, 2011. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Unang LIBRO. 4 mga puna.

Noong Unang Panahon Part 3

photo: Leon B. Dista

I FOUND one more post about the good ol’ days credited to some anonymous netizen called “Oldie” whose sentimentality touched the hearts of even the ’80s and ’90s Generation. Based on this website it was first posted on 11 February 2007 titled “Born in the ’40s, ’50s, ’60s, ’70s?” before getting popular in the email circuit. Somebody (obviously a Filipino) later changed it’s western context and adapted it to the lifestyle of a Pinoy-kid in the ’70s and ’80s.

Here’s “Noong Unang Panahon Part 3”:

“First, some of us survived being born to mothers who did not have an OB-Gyne and drank San Miguel Beer while they carried us. While pregnant, they took cold or cough medicine, ate isaw, and didn’t worry about diabetes.

“Then after all that trauma, our baby cribs were made of hard wood covered with lead-based paints, pati na yung walker natin, matigas na kahoy din at wala pang gulong. We had no soft cushy cribs that play music, no disposable diapers (lampin lang at ‘pardible’ o safety pins).

“When we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, no kneepads , sometimes wala pang preno yung bisikleta.

“As children, we would ride in hot un-airconditioned buses with wooden seats (yung JD bus na pula), or cars with no airconditioning & no seat belts (ngayon lahat may aircon na).

“Riding on the back of a carabao on a breezy summer day was considered a treat. Ngayon hindi na nakakakita ng kalabaw ang mga bata.

“We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle purchased from 7-11 (minsan straight from the faucet or poso). We shared one soft drink bottle with four of our friends, and NO ONE actually died from his. Or contacted hepatitis. We ate rice with star margarine, drank raw eggs straight from the shell, and drank sofdrinks with real sugar in it (hindi diet coke), but we weren’t sick or overweight kasi nga……

“WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!!

“We would leave home in the morning and play all day, and get back when the streetlights came on.

“Sarap mag patintero, tumbang preso , habulan at taguan. No one was able to reach us all day (di uso ang cellphone , walang beepers). And yes, we were O.K.

“We would spend hours building our wooden trolleys (yung bearing ang gulong) or plywood slides out of scraps and then ride down the street , only to find out we forgot the brakes! After hitting the sidewalk or falling into a canal (seweage channel) a few times, we learned to solve the problem ourselves with our bare & dirty hands .

“We did not have Playstations, Nintendo’s, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 100 channels on cable, no DVD movies, no surround stereo, no IPOD’s, no cell phones, no computers, no Internet, no chat rooms, no Facebooks, and no Friendsters. ……

BUT WE HAD REAL FRIENDS and we went outside to actually talk and play with them!

“We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no stupid lawsuits from these accidents. The only rubbing we get is from our friends with the words..’Masakit ba?’ Pero pag galit yung kalaro mo,,,,ang sasabihin sa iyo..’Beh buti nga!’

“We played marbles (jolens) in the dirt , washed our hands just a little and ate dirty ice cream & fish balls. we were not afraid of getting germs in our stomachs.

“We had to live with homemade guns ‘ gawa sa kahoy, tinali ng rubberband , sumpit , tirador at kung ano ano pa na puedeng makasakitan. .Pero masaya pa rin ang lahat.

“We made up games with sticks (syatong ), and cans (tumbang preso) and although we were told they were dangerous, wala naman tayong binulag o napatay. Paminsan minsan may nabubukulan lang.

“We walked, rode bikes, or took tricycles to a friend’s house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them to jump out the window!

“Mini basketball teams had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn’t pass had to learn to deal with the disappointment. Wala yang mga childhood depression at damaged self esteem ek-ek na yan. Ang pikon, talo.

“That generation of ours has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers, creative thinkers and successful professionals ever! They are the CEO’s, Engineers, Doctors and Military Generals of today.

“The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had failure, success, and responsibility. We learned from our mistakes the hard way.

“You might want to share this with others who’ve had the luck to grow up as real kids. We were lucky indeed. And if you like, forward it to your kids too, so they will know how brave their parents were.”

More reminiscing…

PHOTO by Leon B. Dista (visit his site!)

Oktubre 2, 2010. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . TIMEtravel. 4 mga puna.

HOW TO Appreciate… a RAINBOW

SOMETIMES when you feel

that the world is not a good place to be

with all its complicated problems

and all your own problems

all mixed up with everyone else’s,

we are reminded that

there is always joy in the simplest of things.

That at the end of the day

the only thing that matters is

trusting that there is Someone in charge

who will take care of all our worries

and make everything alright.

CLICK THE VIDEO BELOW

and see what real happiness is all about 🙂

(Video’s loading too slow? CLICK>> THIS)

Whenever I bring clouds over the earth

and a rainbow appears in the clouds,

I will remember my covenant between me and you

and all living creatures of every kind.

Never again will the waters become

a flood to destroy all life.”

(Genesis 9:15-16)

Agosto 28, 2010. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Pilosopo PHILOSOPHY, WTF is GRAMMAR?!. 4 mga puna.

Who came first Batman or Superman?

by aLjI– IF you’re wondering who can turn comic books into movies faster than a speeding bullet, I’ll say the Filipinos can.

After stumbling into Dennis Villegas’ and Andrew Leavold’s websites, I’ve come to the conclusion that the Philippines is quicker on the draw… or was quicker.

 The ‘50s up to the ‘70s seemed quite an exciting period in Philippine cinema based on these posters and “komiks” both bloggers have posted on their sites– proof that back in the day when copyright infringement was more blurry than it is today; Philippine cinema and the Komikbook industry had quite an impressive output of plagiarized superheroes.

Here are some samples in a blog we’ll call:

 WHO CAME FIRST…?

1.  “IRON MAN: The Movie “or “CAPTAIN BARBELL Kontra CAPTAIN BAKAL” Da Pelikula?!

Iron Man first appeared in Tales of Suspense, published by Marvel Comics in 1963.

“Iron Man: The Movie” starring Robert Downey, Jr was released in 2008 .

“Captain Barbell Kontra Captain Bakal” (obviously, “Captain Bakal” was the Iron Man of the Philippines) starring Willie Sotelo as “Captain Barbell” and  Carlos Padilla, Jr. as “Dario”  was shown in 1965…

 …43 years before Downey’s blockbuster film.

 2. “LITTLE MERMAID” or “DYESEBEL”?!

“Little Mermaid” is an original Hans Christian Anderson tale published in 1837 .

There have been a lot of versions in both films and TV shows. The most famous today is, of course, the Disney cartoon “Little Mermaid” which was shown in 1989.

The Philippine movie version starred Jaime Dela Rosa and Edna Luna as “Dyesebel”, a dead-on copy of the Little Mermaid. It was shown in 1953…

…a full 36 years prior to the famed Disney version.

 3. “BATMAN” or “ALYAS BATMAN AT ROBIN”?!

 After the success of Adam West’s “Batman” TV series, they turned it into a full-length film creatively called… “Batman”, and was released in 1966.

The movie follow-up came a bit late via Tim Burton’s … hold your breath…“Batman”, starring Michael Keaton in 1989.

The Philippines had its own movie version featuring Bob Soler and Lou Salvador, Jr. in “Alyas Batman at Robin” and was released in 1965…

…one year before the Adam West-movie and

24 years before Tim Burton’s.

“Holy cajoney, Batman!”

 4.  “CATWOMAN” or “PUSSYCAT”?!

Speaking of Batman, one of his arch nemesis or ex-girl friends (depending on which storyline you believe) had a solo production in “Catwoman” with the scorching Halle Berry playing the . But as hot as Halle was, the critics and audiences gave it the cold shoulder and it flopped back in 2004.

Not so with its Philippine version titled “Pussycat”. It starred the equally hot Divina Valencia (of the classic “Divina Valencia, Estella Suarez, nagbu-burles.. song) and was released in 1969…

…35 years before Halle’s unimpressive movie. “Pussy-cat” was a certified hit in ’69 right on that memorable summer of free love and free pussy, if you know what I mean.

 5.  MR. FANTASTIC in the “FANTASTIC FOUR” or “LASTIKMAN”?!

Marvel superhero Reed Richards (a.k.a  “Mr. Fantastic”) of the Fantastic Four is an exact copy of DC Comic’s “Plastic Man”. Why do I say this? Well, just look:

 

The thing is Plastic Man came out in the comics on August 1941, while Marvel’s version called Mr. Fantastic appeared 20 years after on November 1961.

Go figure.

Anyway, Mr. Fantastic was brought to the movie screens only in 2005 in “Fantastic Four” played by Ioan Gruffudd. Maybe because the technology to show Mr. Fantastic’s power to extend various parts of his body (hmmm…?) were not available yet, the Hollywood version was a bit late.

 Movie special effects were not a problem in the Philippines back in 1965 when Von Serna (Snooky’s dad!) appeared as “Lastik Man”—Yes! pLastic Man, without the “P”– 40 years before Hollywood’s Mr. Fantastic.

 Anak ng P , talaga!

If you think that was strange, how about this mash-up:

 6.  “THE SPIRIT” + THE QUESTION + MR. A

+ ROSARCH of the “Watchmen” + “SPIDERMAN”

= “CAPTAIN GAGAMBA”?!

The Spirit created by the great Will Eisner first appeared as a newspaper insert in 1940.

Hollywood turned it into a movie in 2008, written and directed by another great artist: Frank Miller (300 and Sin City).

 The Question (below) and Mr. A (below The Question) appeared in 1967 although in different comicbooks: The Question in Blue Beetle #1 while Mr. A in Witzend # 3.

These comic book heroes, both created by Steve Ditko, clearly play up the Q and A reference: “Question and Answer”. Get it?

Alan Moore created Rorschach (below) for the comic book series The Watchmen in 1986 and admittedly says that Rorschach was based on Ditko’s The Question.  

The Watchmen was shown in 2009 to rave reviews (there’s Rorschach in the middle).

Spiderman was the creation of Stan Lee and Steve Ditko (again!) and was first seen on Amazing Fantasy # 15 in August 1962.

Then in 2002, Sam Raimi directed the movie“Spider-Man” starring Tobey Maguire.

And then it got weird-err:

 Just a year after Spider-Man’s comic book debut, out comes the movie “Bakas Ng Gagamba”! It featured Bernard Bonnin (Charlene Gonzales-Muhlach’s father) in 1963.

 

This Pinoy superhero is an obvious combination of The Spirit, The Question, Mr. A (note: the fedora hat) and yes, Spider-Man (place Spidey’s chest on Gagamba’s face and you’ll get the picture).

Now if the US version starring Tobey Maguire had sequels, the Philippine version had more:

Part 2: “PALOS KONTRA GAGAMBA” (1963)

Part 3: “ANG LIHIM NG GAGAMBA” (1963)

Part 4: “GAGAMBA AT SI SCORPIO” (1969)

Spider-Man 4, also known as “Spider-Man Reboot” will be out in theaters on 2012—almost 50 years after “Gagamba at si Scorpio”.

7.    “PHANTOM” or “ALYAS PHANTOM”?!

While writing this part, I suddenly noticed the frequent use of the words “Alyas” and “Captain” in most of these old Filipino films.  I guess the words “Alyas” and “Captain” it makes it seem like it’s the original without claiming to be the original. Pretty smart, huh?

Anyway, here’s another Alyas-movie–  “Alyas Phantom”!

The comic book character the Phantom was created by Lee Falk in 1936.

“Alyas Phantom”, the Filipino film was shown in 1966, a mere 30 years after, starring Bob Soler and Nova Villa (the comedienne) as his leading lady.

It was such a hit, another version came out in 1974 where the Phantom became a transvestite of  some sort, with gay icon Vilma Santos as its star called “Phantom Lady”.

The Hollywood version came early this time (thank goodness!) in 1943 with a 15-part movie-serial starring Tom Tyler and Jeanne Bates. But the Phantom-movie everyone remembers today was the one starring Billy Zane in 1996 called “The Phantom”.

You do remember Billy, right?

Stop shaking your head.

 8.     “SUPERGIRL” or “SUPERGIRL”?!

First of all, Supergirl has never been Superman’s girl friend. She’s actually his cousin. In 1959 Kara Zor-El appeared in Action Comics #252 wearing the same Superman costume after crashing on earth from Planet Krypton.

Fourteen years later, by some Kryptonian miracle, Supergirl appeared in the Philippines as the actress Pinky Montilla in a movie with the same title: “Supergirl” in 1973.

 In 1984, 11 years after the Philippine version, Hollywood came up with “Supergirl”  starring Helen Slater. According to Wikipedia “It failed to impress critics and audiences”.

 Both movies were not as super as they expected.

 9.    “SUPERMAN the Movie” or “ZOOM, ZOOM, SUPERMAN”?!

The most famous Superman movie version was, of course, the 1978 film “Superman” starring Christopher Reeve. This movie came out 40 years after Superman first appeared inside the pages of Action Comics # 1 created by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster in 1938!

If you think Hollywood had one over the quick Filipino filmmakers of the ‘70s, think again.

In 1973, a full five years before Chris Reeve donned the red cape as “Superman” , a Filipino version called “Zoom, Zoom, Superman!” broke all Philippine box-office records existing at that time.

It starred Ariel Ureta (I guess, the top matinee idol that time?) and he had the best directors of Philippine cinema directing this three-in-one Ariel Ureta treat (like, one was not enough): Elwood Perez, Joey Gosiengfiao and National Artist for Cinema Ishmael Bernal.

Can Brian Singer beat Ishma, the National Artist? Guess not.

10.    “POPEYE” or “POPEYE ATBP”?!

Proof that Ariel Ureta was quite a box-office draw in the ‘70s, the same producers quickly came up with a follow-up just months after in 1973 called “Popeye Atbp”, directed by the same directors. Talk about striking while the iron is hot.

Popeye is the world’s most famous sailor-man, created by E.C. Segar as a newspaper comic strip in 1919. So, the Philippine movie version was late by about 54 years.

How late was Hollywood this time? About 61 years late!

In 1980, Robert Altman directed Robin Williams in the live-action-sing-along-film Popeye. It was Robin’s first movie and Popeye’s last.

Hollywood didn’t even attempt a sequel.

SOURCES:

Andrew Leavold

Dennis Villegas

Wikipedia.com

Google Images

Marvel Comics

DC Comics

Warner Brothers

Mayo 6, 2010. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . WTF is GRAMMAR?!, tribal TRIVIA. 5 mga puna.

“Age” by Larry Miller

(by ely m.) WHILE digging into some more email trash that’s been clogging my yahoo account (been doing this for a couple of months now– I’m sure you’ve noticed if you’re a regular “scannedthoughtero”), I came across this classic philosophical chainmail disguised as internet goobledigook. The thing is, this one actually makes a lot of sense.

And having all the time in the world, I Googled for more info about it: about George Carlin mainly, because it was attributed to this late, great standup comic. Turns out, Carlin was not the author of this standup classic. It was actually Larry Miller.

We all know who George Carlin is (yes, he’s the ponytailed  “Rufus”  in “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure“).

But who the hell is Larry Miller?

He’s the gay guy from “Princess Diaries 1 and 2“– the one who did the makeover for hottie Anne Hattaway.

So, this blog will help hopefully in setting the record straight: That Larry Miller is THE MAN!

And George Carlin had a totally diferent take on “Ageing”.

Here’s the whole Classic Email:

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids?

If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited about aging that you think in fractions. ‘How old are you?’

‘I’m four and A HALF!’

You’re never thirty-six and a half. You’re four and a half, going on five! That’s the key.

You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

‘How old are you?’

 ‘I’m GONNA be 16!’

You could be 13, but hey, you’re gonna be 16!

And then the greatest day of your life ! You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony.

“You BECOME 21. Yesss!!! “

But then you

TURN 30.

Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There’s no fun now, you’re Just a sour-dumpling. What’s wrong? What’s changed?

You BECOME 21

 You TURN 30

then you’re PUSHING 40.

Whoa! Put on the brakes, it’s all slipping away.

Before you know it,

you REACH 50

and your dreams are gone.

 But wait!!!

 You MAKE it to 60.

 You didn’t think you would!

  So you

BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

 You’ve built up so much speed

 that you HIT 70!

 After that it’s a day-by-day thing;

you HIT Wednesday!

 You GET INTO your 80’s

and every day is a complete cycle;

you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime.

And it doesn’t end there.

Into the 90s, you start going backwards;

‘I WAS JUST 92.’

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again.

‘How old are you?’

‘I’m 100 AND A HALF!’

May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!

(Here’s the actual video of Larry doing this bit.)

Here’s George Carlin’s:

And here’s the source that definitely prove where the confusion started:

Case closed.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

Abril 19, 2010. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Pilosopo PHILOSOPHY, WTF is GRAMMAR?!. 4 mga puna.

The WISDOM of UP Professors

FROM an antique e-mail. Still inspiring. Still very funny.

ON GRADES

“Oo, nagpapa-ulan ako ng Uno… baket? Aaanhin ko ba ’yun? ‘Di naman ako yayaman du’n.”

–Sir Atoy Navarro, Hist

 

Professor habang binubuksan ang isang box ng colored chalks:

“Ano ba naman ito?!” (sabay hagis sa table ng mga dark colored chalk)

Class: (Tahimik na nagmamasid)

Professor: “Class, sulatan n’yo ang manufacturer ng chalk na ito. Sabihin ninyong tanggalin na ang mga walang kuwentang kulay na ito: Brown, Green at Violet. Alam ba nilang hindi ito nakikita sa board? Convince them!”

Class: (Tahimik at nagulat)

Professor: “Sino man ang magsusulat  +.25 sa Final Grade!”

Class: “Yahoooo!!!”

Isang Valentine’s Day:

“Ano ba ‘yan? Students ba kayo ng UP? Bakit ang bababa ng scores ninyo? Siguro wala kayong date ngayong Valentine’s kaya ganito kayo? Losers!!! When I was your age, I had a date. Hindi ba naapektuhan ng UP Fair euphoria ang grades ninyo? Parang hindi kayo masaya…” (sabay tapon ng quiz papers sa sahig). “I won’t record this. Go and find a date.” (sabay walk out ng classroom)

—Sir Doliente, BA.

 

Student: “Sir, nagbibigay po ba kayo ng partial points?”

Professor: “Hmmm… if I see partial wisdom.”

ON EXAMINATIONS

Professor to Class:

“I don’t give surprise long exams. All exams are announced. Kaya today I’m announcing, ‘Class, mag-e-exam tayo! NGAYON NA!’”

–Ma’am Chei

 

“Don’t take the Bar Exam and yourselves too seriously. Baka mabalitaan na lang naming, nag-o-oral summation kayo sa Luneta. O lumulutang-lutang sa Pasig River. Enjoy yourselves. Relax. At habang nag-re-relax kayo, read at least 15 hours a day. Mag-relax ka habang nag-babasa. Mag-relax ka habang nagme-memorize.”

“’Pag nananaba ka sa oras ng exams, ibig sabihin hindi ka papasa.”

–Anonymous Prof

 

“Kahit magpakamatay ka pa, ‘di mo masasagot ‘yang problem set na ‘yan—dahil wala ‘yang sagot. Hahahaha!”

“Mamatay na ang mangopya… at ang hindi maka-100—BOBO!”

–Hist Prof

 

Professor habang umuulan sa labas during a hard final exam:

“Ang lakas ng ulan. Ayos ‘yan, at least hindi halata ‘pag umiiyak.”

–Sir Agapito

ON STUDYING

Commenting on a thesis of a Senior Student:

“’Yang thesis mo… mamamatay ka! Mamamatay ka!!!”

–Dr. Llanes, UPM

 

Professor: “O, meron na ba sa inyong nakapunta sa pinakabagong Mall ng Metro Manila?”

Class: (Super-tahimik)

Professor: “Anoooo?! Puro na lang ba kayo aral? Aral lang kayo nang aral—wala kayong kapupuntahan sa kaaaral n’yo!”

In a class with one meeting left in the Term:

“Okay class, next week, we start the lecture proper.”

–Ma’am Vitriolo

 

Professor to Student:

“Running ka ba for Summa?—Mapapagod ka lang.”

Professor to Grad Student during a Thesis Defense: “Are you familiar with the book written by (name of the author)?”

Grad Student (kinakabahan): “Y-yes, Sir.”

Professor: “Okay. Ano ang kulay ng cover ng book na ‘yun?”

 

ON LOUSY STUDENTS

“Anong molars? You don’t say molars, because it’s an adjective! Do you say ‘Beautifuls’?”

–Ma’am Liao commenting on a student’s grammar

Professor to a freshman who would not stand up during recitation:

“Stand up, Miss —  so that we might see the contours of your body. (Student stands) … Wow! Rape-able!”

 

 “Sa mga taga-UP lang ako bilib, eh. Papasok sila sa Law School na hindi disoriented. Bilib ako sa study habits ng mga batang iyan. Some of them look like they eat kamote three times a day. Pero ang utak nila, hindi ututin!”

Professor to a noisy class:

“Bakit napakasaya ng klase n’yo?! Pwede bang maging sad naman kayo? 5 minutes of sadness—starting right now!”

 

Professor to a class na ayaw mag-recite:

“Wag kayong mahiya. You have nothing to lose but your face!”

–Geo11 Prof

“It’s okay to smoke in my class. As long as you don’t breathe it out.”

–Dr. Obsioma, Biodiversity

 

Professor to a student with braces:

“Ayan, hindi ka na makasagot. ‘Yung bakal sa ipin mo, naapektuhan na ‘yung pagsasalita mo.”

–Sir Tiamson, Span 11

After the first hour of a three hour lecture on Taxonomy:

“Class, gising pa ba kayo? Mukhang inaantok na kayo, ah. I understand… pati nga ako, inaantok na rin.”

–Dr. Gapud

 

Professor after giving a joke related to his lecture topic:

“’Yung mga hindi natawa sa joke ko, REPEATERS kayo ano? Narinig n’yo na kasi ‘yang joke na ‘yan. Sorry kayo. ‘Yan lang ang joke ko.”

 ON BEING HUMAN

“The human body is 70% water. Kaya wala kayong kasaysayan lahat. ‘Pag may kaaway ka, sabihin mo sa kanya, TUBIG KA LANG!”

– Dr. Recio

 

“Try everything once, except incest.”

–Sir U Eliserio during a Creative Writing Class

“Nasa bandang gilid ang fallopian tube. Kaya kung gusto ninyong magka-anak ng asawa ninyo, dapat nakatagilid kayo habang gumagawa.”

–Ma’am Maggie, Zoo 10

 

“Yes, class—I AM GAY! I’m so gay I could show you my penis because it is but an accessory to my body.”

–Jean Navera, spcm 1

“Look at me. I’m 43 years old pero ang lakas-lakas ko pa. Kung walang gulay kakain ako ng damo. Kung walang tubig, mag-iipon na lang ako ng laway.”

 

“Birds of the same feather, FLOCK together… don’t forget the ‘L’”.

–SocSci Prof

ON RELATIONSHIPS

First day of Classes:

“Kung may boyfriend o girlfriend kayo na hindi taga-UP, hiwalayan n’yo na ngayon pa lang. Walang kapupuntahan ‘yang relasyon n’yo. Dahil hindi kayo magkakaintindihan. ‘Tapos ‘yung mga anak n’yo, magiging bobo. Gusto n’yo ba ‘yun?”

 

“And girls, ‘wag kayong kukuha  ng boyfriend diro sa UP. Pare-pareho tayong mahirap dito. 80% of the child’s intelligence comes from the mother naman, eh. And guys, ‘wag kayong kukuha ng bobong babae. Kahit matalino kayo, magiging bobo pa rin ang mga anak n’yo.”

 ON POWER

Professor : “Many people believe that we psychology professors can read minds… (Silence). Actually, we can.

Students: “Weh… sample…

Professor: “Right now, you think I’m bluffin.”

–Ma’am Chei Billedo, Psych

 

“Nu’ng freshie ako, atheist ako. Pero ‘pag nasa bahay, nagro-rosary kami ng nanay ko. Eh, kung magalit sa ‘kin ‘yun.”

–Socio 11 Professor

“Class, gusto ko kayong i-train na mag-English. So, when you’re here in my class, magsalita kayo ng English. Ako lang ang exempted dahil matanda na ako, at ako ang teacher!”

 

Prof to a student asking if he can sit in:

“We only accept members of a certain minority group in this class. For example, gays are part of a minority group. Bakla ka ba? If you admit that you are, then I’ll let you sit in.”

–Prof. “Hail to the Chair”

“The more wisdom you obtain, the more you should shut your mouth. This is because the more you learn, the more you realize that there are even more things that you do not know. The true mark of an idiot is a loudmouth. The true mark of a wise man is humility.”

–PI100. Puta, Best Prof sa CAL

 

 ON OTHERS

 Professor commenting on other Universities:

“Class, kaya ang mahal ng bayad sa mga professors sa ibang school kasi ang bobobo ng mga estudyante du’n. I used to teach in XXXXX at lumuluha talaga ako ng dugo bago maintindihan ng mga students ‘yung mga sinasabi ko. Ang mahal nga ng bayad, magkakasakit ka naman sa panga sa kauulit ng lessons. ‘Wag na lang. Dito na lang ako sa UP, et least, nagkakaintindihan tayo, ‘di ba?”

–Dr. David

Student: “Sir, pwede po bang maki-sit in ‘yung friends ko?”

Professor: “From what school are they?”

Student: “St. Scho po.”

Professor: “Go ahead. So they’ll realize what they’re missing.”

 

“Class, Chinatown is not in China. And Ateneo De Manila University is not… a university.”

–Prof name withheld upon request

“Si Mirriam, crush ko ‘yun dati. Muntikan na kaming maging kami. Kaso nasiraan siya ng ulo kaya ‘yun iba ang napangasawa ko.”

–Old UP Prof.

 

“Bilib ka kay Alan Peter Cayetano? Eh, ang bababa ng grades nu’n?!

–Ex-Prof ni Alan

ON LEAVING

 “When you graduate, then you begin to live!”

–Dr. Jimenez, Psych 118

 

“To tell you the truth, I don’t much. I only know enough to teach my classes.”

–UP Socio Prof

 

thank you kay http://bonggaboom.multiply.com/journal/item/35
at sa photo ng http://www.worldendeavors.com/main/programbrochure/programid/38

Abril 6, 2010. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Pilosopo PHILOSOPHY. 3 mga puna.

The 12 Apostles: Skinned, Stoned, Sawed, Burned and Beheaded

(LjI) AS we remember the Passion of our Lord Jesus Christ this Holy Week, have you ever wondered what happened to the 12 Apostles after Jesus died on the cross? We all know that the Romans and the powerful Jewish leaders in Jerusalem were all looking for them for being guilty “by association”.

This source tells us that the Apostles (except, of course, Judas Iscariot) “… locate a ship and sailed away” to another city, leaving Jerusalem for fear of being arrested. They only came back to Jerusalem– after all the excitement and controversy quieted down– during Pentecost (originally a Jewish festival celebrating grain harvest and commemorating Moses receiving the Ten Commandments). But, according to Acts 2:1:4, while the Apostles gathered for the feast:

“…Suddenly there was a noise from heaven like the sound of a mighty wind. It filled the house where they were meeting. Then they saw what looked like fiery tongues moving in all directions, and a tongue came and settled on each person there. The Holy Spirit took control of everyone, and they began speaking whatever languages the Spirit let them speak.”

That’s how they received the Holy Spirit—and soon after, they courageously left their hiding place and started preaching and performing miracles, in the name of Jesus Christ, right in the streets of Jerusalem and in different languages!

Try to imagine the simplest, most quiet and easily intimidated man you know (most of the Apostles were fishermen, remember) suddenly speaking out like the smartest university professor you admire or a veteran politician on a reelection campaign trail—and you’ll get the idea on how miraculous this was.

During that time according to this source, “many religious Jews from every country in the world were living in Jerusalem … they were hearing everything in their own languages.”

The noise and activity attracted a huge crowd and the Apostle Peter preached a sermon to the crowd with great effectiveness that “On that day about three thousand believed his message and were baptised…” (Acts 2:41) establishing a solid and unstoppable Christian group in Jerusalem.

And as Jesus asked of them in Mark 16:14:

“Go yea into all the world and preach the good news to every creature.”

SO THEY DID.

But where did they go?

What did they do?

And what happened to them?

Let us use Da Vinci’s “Last Supper” (photo above) as our starting point:

Bartholomew (skinned alive and beheaded)—Preached the Gospel in Mesopotamia (Iraq), Persia (Iran), Turkey, Armenia and India. He was skinned alive and beheaded at Derbent (Azerbaijan, near Russia) on the Caspian Sea by order of a local king after a majority of the people of Derbent converted to Christianity. Some of Bartholomew’s skin and bones are still kept in The Basilica of St. Bartholomew in Rome, a part of his skull is in Frankfurt, Germany and an arm is venerated at the Canterbury Cathedral in England.

James, the Lesser (stoned and clubbed-to-death)—Believed to have preached in Damascus (Syria) and acknowledged as the first bishop of the Christians in Jerusalem (Israel). Historians say he was sentenced to be stoned-to-death by the Jews for challenging Jewish Laws and for convincing some of members of the Jewish community to convert to Christianity. James died when during the stoning, one person from the crowd approached him and bashed his head with a fullers club (a piece of wood used for bashing-washing clothes). He was buried on the spot where he died, somewhere in Jerusalem.

Andrew (crucified upside down on an X-shaped cross)—Preached in Georgia (Russia), Istanbul (Turkey), Macedonia and finally Greece. There in Patros, Greece, the Governor Aegiatis was angered by the apostle’s preaching and the conversion of his own family to Christianity. He ordered Andrew to renounce his faith in front of a tribunal. When Andrew resisted, the governor ordered that Andrew be crucified. He was tied upside down to an X-shaped cross with thick, tight ropes but Andrew kept preaching to spectators. He was able to convince many to accept Christianity just before he died after suffering for three days. Parts of his remains are in Constantinople (Turkey), Scotland (United Kingdom), but his skull is kept in Patras to this day.

Judas Iscariot (suicide, death by hanging)—Best known as the apostle who betrayed the Lord by divulging His location, leading to His arrest and persecution. He received 30 pieces of silver from Jewish priests for the information he gave. Prior to this, Judas served as the treasurer of the 12 Apostles; in charge of keeping the group’s budget/money. Sources could not agree on how he died. There are three accepted versions: (1) he committed suicide by hanging himself to a tree, (2) he accidentally fell on a field– head first (3) he was crushed by a passing chariot (4) he was stoned-to-death by the other 11 Apostles. But all four agree that “his bowels gushed out” (Ewwww!) on all four accounts. Authors and scholars also agree that his guilt was a major part of the cause of his death.

Peter (crucified upside down)—Recognized as the head of the original Christian community in Jerusalem (Israel), he left the city when King Herod Agrippa I started to persecute all Christians in Jerusalem and ordered the beheading of the Apostle James (the Great) . After escaping from Jerusalem, Peter preached in Judea (originally Palestine) and in Antioch (Syria) where he is historically considered as the first patriarch (bishop) of the Orthodox Church. After staying in Antioch for some time, Peter went to Rome and converted thousands into Christianity. The emperor at the time, Nero, did not like the idea of Romans becoming Christians and used the new members of the group for his amusement (e.g. feeding them to lions or wild dogs, and then burning them at stake in Rome’s coliseum—yes, the tourist spot– if they do not renounce their faith). Peter was one of the most prominent victims of this persecution. He was captured and crucified upside-down at his own request, because he said he was not worthy to be crucified the same way as our Lord. St. Peter’s body lies below the altar of St. Peter’s Basilica at the Vatican City, in Rome.

John (thrown into boiling oil, but survived)—For most of his labours, John was with Peter in Jerusalem up until the persecution of Herod Agrippa I. During this period, scholars agree that Johh escaped and preached for sometime in Asia Minor (an area around Turkey). Years later, scholars have traced that he went to Rome where it was believed he was persecuted with other Christians and was thrown into a cauldron of boiling oil—he miraculously survived. The Roman emperor at the time, Dominitian, decided after the incident to banish John to the island of Patmos (in Greece). When Dominitian died, John went back to Ephesus (in Turkey) where he spent the rest of his days. He died a very old man, the only Apostle to do so.

Thomas (impaled by a spear)—Called by most Christians as the “Doubting Thomas” for disbelieving the Lord’s Resurrection. But after his doubts were erased by touching Jesus’ wounds, he became a fearless preacher of the Gospel and builder of churches. He was the only Apostle who witnessed the Assumption of Mary and the one of the first Apostles who preached outside the boundaries of the vast Roman Empire (out of Europe). He preached in Babylon (present day Iraq) and established its first Christian church. Then he went to Persia (Iran) and travelled as far as China and India. He was martyred in Mylapore, India when a local king named Masdai condemned Thomas to death. The Apostle angered the Brahmins (high ranked priests/scholars who served as the king’s advisers) who thought Christianity disrespected India’s Caste System. Thomas was brought to a nearby mountain and was stabbed-to-death with a spear. He is believed to be buried around the suburb of Madras, in India.

James, the Great (beheaded)—Brother of the Apostle John. He decided to preached the Gospel in Iberia (around Spain) and be the first to build a Christian foundation in the area. But according to some scholars, the Virgin Mary appeared to James and told him to return to Judea (around Israel) to help the other Apostles. He was captured and condemned to die by Herod the Agrippa 1 to please Jewish leaders who were furious at the rapid growth of the Church. James’ chief accuser was later convinced that the Apostle was indeed blessed by the Lord, he himself requested to be beheaded with James. After this, James’ body was brought back to Spain by his disciples and was buried in the area where the cathedral of Santiago de Compostela is located, which is now considered as a major religious site.

Phillip (crucified)—Preached in Greece, Syria and in Turkey (in the cities of Galatia, Phrygia and Hierapolis). Philip partnered with Bartholomew in his missions. Like all Apostles, Philip became an exceptional speaker. According to sources “Through his miraculous healing and preaching, Philip converted the wife of the Preconsul of the city” of Hierapolis. Of course, this event angered the Preconsul and ordered that both Philip and Bartholomew be tortured and crucified upside down. While on the cross, Philip continued to preach and he was able to convince the crowd and the Preconsul to release Bartholomew, while insisting that he (Philip) remained crucified. Bartholomew was released but Philip died on the cross and was later buried somewhere within the city.

Matthew (burned-to-death?)—Was a rich tax collector and the most educated among the Apostles. Christian tradition says he preached in Ethiopia (in Africa), Judea (Israel today), Macedonia, Syria and Parthia (northeast Iran). Bible scholars have different versions on how he died. Some say he was either killed with a sword in Parthia or he died a natural death in Ethiopia. The most interesting and dramatic story appeared here, where it says Matthew came to a city (unnamed) and was able to convert the family of the local king to Christianity. This angered the king and ordered his soldiers to capture Matthew. In front of a huge crowd, they nailed him unto a bed, covered his whole body with paper, oil, brimstone, asphalt and brushwood and then they set him ablaze. Matthew was able to endure the torture while praising and preaching, but eventually died “a happy death”. Everyone who touched the burnt bed after was miraculously healed and converted into Christianity, including the king who asked for forgiveness and became a staunch Christian believer.

Jude Thaddeus (sawed or axed to death?)—the Patron Saint of Desperate Cases and Lost Causes was a farmer before becoming an Apostle. He was a partner of Simon the Zealot and together they preached and converted non-believers in Judea (Israel), Persia (Iran), Samaria (Israel), Idumaea (near Jordan), Syria, Mesopotamia (Iran) and Libya. It is also widely believed that Jude travelled and preached in Beirut, Lebanon. He also helped Bartholomew in bringing Christianity to Armenia. The cause of his death in unclear because of the existence of two versions: (1) He was crucified in Edessa, Turkey; (2) He was clubbed-to-death and his body was either sawed or axed in pieces after (together with Simon the Zealot). Some sources say he was buried either in Northern Persia or the most accepted version that his remains are buried in a crypt at St. Peter’s Basilica in Rome.

Simon the Zealot (sawed or axed-to-death?)—Before becoming an apostle, Simon was a member of the “Zealots”, a political movement rebelling against the Roman occupation of Jerusalem. Identified by some as the second Bishop of Jerusalem after James the Lesser (who was beheaded). He’s also believed to have preached in the Middle East, North Africa, Egypt, Mauritania and even Britain. His martyrdom is being debated by scholars and historians who claim Simon might have been crucified by the Romans in Lincolnshire, Britain, crucified in Samaria (Israel) after a failed revolt or sawed-to-death in Suanir, Persia with Jude Thaddeus.

Sources:

http://www.biblepath.com/peter.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/12_apostles#The_Twelve_Apostles
http://www.damascusfriends.org/Revelation/Revelation04.htm
http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/01117a.htm
http://books.google.com/
 http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/newtestament/section5.rhtml

Marso 29, 2010. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . tribal TRIVIA, WTF is GRAMMAR?!. 15 mga puna.

GROCERY ng mga BALIW

(ely m.)–  SA pagpasok ng 2010, maraming mga bagay na dapat nang ibahin, alisin at itapon kasama ng 2009.

Sa paborito naming grocery, sinadya kong kausapin ang may-ari upang bigyan siya ng suhestiyon tungkol sa ilang produkto na kanyang ibinebenta sa kanyang tindahan.

Sabi ko sa kanya, mas makakatulong kung iibahin, aalisin at itatapon na niya ang mga ito sa mula sa kanyang grocery dahil hindi ito nakakatulong sa pagpaparami ng kanyang mga kliyente.

Muntik na nga naming i-boycott ang kanyang tindahan dahil marami sa paninda niya ang nakakainsulto.

Ito ang ilan sa mga produktong sa tingin ko’y nararapan na niyang tantanan:

FIESTA POKPOK (breaded chicken)– Binatukan ako ng isa kong kaibigan nang iregalo ko ito sa kanya noong nakaraang Pasko. Nainsulto raw siya. Ano raw ba ang gusto kong palabasin. Nakalimutan ko kasing dati nga pala siyang Japayuki. Hangang ngayong Enero hindi pa kami nag-uusap.

GERY SALUUT (chocolates) — Hindi lang ang kaibigan kong Japayuki ang nagagalit sa akin ngayon, kundi lalo na ang bestfriend kong si Gery. Laking pagkakamali ko nga nang ito ang iniregalo ko sa kanya sa aming exchange gift last December dahil pagkatanggap na pagkatanggap niya nito, nagkaroon bigla ng epidemic ng Bird Flu sa baryo nila. Siya nga ang sinisisi ngayong nagdala ng virus sa liblib na lugar na ‘yun pagkatapos niyang ipamigay ang mga tsokolateng ito sa mga kapitbahay nila.

BIG SHEET (dried sea weeds)– Noong binili ko ito, tuwang-tuwa ako at masarap naman talaga siyang papakin. Nakatatlong pakete yata ako. Laking gulat ko na lang dahil pagkatapos noon, tatlong araw din akong sinumpong ng constipation– hindi nga ako matae. Bakit? Kasi hindi magkasya ang size ng ebs ko papalabas sa butas ng pwet ko. Importante talagang intindihin ang “title” ng bawat kinakain natin.

POO (chips) — Ito ang nakita kong solusyon sa aking constipation problems dahil sa pagkain ng “Big Sheet”. Isang linggo akong kumakain ng “Poo”, mula Pasko hanggang Bagong Taon. Epektib naman ang produktong ito. Mula nang kumain ako ng “Poo”, hindi ko na nga kinakailang umire tuwing ako ay magpu-“poo”. Kusa na siyang lumalabas. Parang bukas na gripo. Advice ko lang matapos ninyong kumain nito, bumili na rin kayo ng maraming Modess at Whisper at mahirap ngang pigilan ang “cycle” ‘pag nagsimula na siyang tumulo.

BAWAL (kainin) — AT LEAST, sa fish section ng grocery naging honest ang may-ari to advice us kung ano ang pwede at “BAWAL” kainin. Nilampasan ko na nga ang area na ito at naghanap na ako ng ibang mabibili.

BULL FROG — Wala kaming mabiling Chicken or Ham noong New Year’s Eve kaya ito na lang ang ti-nurbo namin. Masarap pala kumain ng palaka habang umiinom ng Kopi Luak. What is Kopi Luak? Click THIS.

TRANSMORPHERS 2 — Sino ba naman ang hindi nase-sexy-han kay Megan Fox? Si Megan nga lang ang dahilan kung bakit ko pinanood ang “Transformers”. At inabangan ko talaga ang pagpapalabas ng Transformers 2. Kaya nang makita ko ito, binili ko agad. Kaso, hindi na naman nga ako nagbasa ng label– ibang pelikula pala ito. After wasting two hours watching this piece of sheet waiting for Megan Fox to appear, noon ko lang naintindihan ang ibig sabihin ng tag line na nasa cover ng (pirated) Blu-Ray Disc na ito: “Even the most dedicated Bad Movie fans will have difficulty slogging through this one”. And worst– wala nga si Megan sa pelikula.

AIR CORPSE (t-shirt) — IREREGALO ko sana ito sa kaibigan naming kapitan sa US Air Force. Mabuti na lang may nakapansin sa diyaskeng spelling na itinatak sa t-shirt. Imaginin n’yo na lang, idedestino siya sa Middle East at nakasuot siya ng ganito?

SUMMER VACATION (tour package) — SINO nga ba naman ang hindi matutuwa sa regalong ganito: Isang Summer Vacation Tour Package going to Singapore? Okey na sana, kaso ang sama ng mensahe sa ibaba ng poster. Kayo ba magpapa-schedule pa sa “departed” date na naka-post on this summer trip? Bagay na bagay nga ang package tour na ito kung balak ninyong bilhin at isuot ‘yung AIR CORPSE t-shirt sa itaas. Hahaha!

J.CO’s J.PoPs “Has Born” ! — PAGLABAS namin sa Grocery ng mga Baliw, napadaan kami sa isa J.Co Doughnut Store.  May bago pala silang produkto: ang “baby donuts”. Nang mabasa namin ang tag line sa display shelves nila, naengganyo na kaming bumili. Tamang-tama itong pansalubong sa bagong taon  — dahil 2010 Has Born!

Happy New Year sa lahat ng readers ng scannedthoughts!

Let’s continue scannedthoughting each other in 2010!

Enero 2, 2010. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . I THOUGHT utot. 10 mga puna.

PASKO: Noong Unang Panahon

Disyembre 18, sa isang Elementary School:

(ni aLJI) PAGDATING pa lang ni Utoy sa eskuwelahan, napansin na niyang kakaiba ang hitsura ng kuwarto ng Section 4. Halatang hindi agad umuwi kahapon si Miss Kurdapiya, ‘yung titser niyang payat at nakasalamin ng makapal. Nagkabit muna ito ng mga Pamaskong dekorasyon: May maliit na Belen ngayon sa isang sulok na ang katawan ng mga karakter ng Bibliya ay gawa sa nirolyong papel na nagkorteng Mayon Volcano at ang mga ulo nila ay gawa sa isang buong balat ng nilagang itlog na dinisenyuhan ng colored marker para magkaroon ng mukha. Meron ding mga papel na letrang nakasabit sa itaas ng blackboard na nagsasabing “Maligayang Pasko at Manigong Bagong Taon” na puno ng iba’t ibang kulay. Nakapalibot sa buong kuwarto ang napakahabang kabit-kabit na Christmas lights, gaya ng sikat na kabaret sa may tumana na paboritong puntahan ng tatay niya. At sa kabilang  sulok naman, may nakatayong Christmas Tree na gawa sa nakataob na walis tingting. Nakasuksok ang tingting sa isang malaking lata ng Milo na pinuno ng buhangin mula sa ginagawang bagong school building sa tabi. Binalutan naman ang bawat patpat ng tingting ng puting crepe paper at sinabitan ng mga plastic na bolang palawit sa dulo nito. Mukhang pagod nga ang masungit na mukha ni Ma’am, pero may kakaibang ngiti siya nu’ng araw na ‘yun.

Hindi naman magpapatalo si Utoy kay Mis Kurdapiya kung Pasko din lang ang pag-uusapan. Nagtulong sila kahapon ng tatay niyang gumawa ng parol para madala niya sa eskuwelahan. Assignment nila ‘yun. Bilib nga siya sa tatay niya dahil habang gumagawa ito ng parol, panay rin ang tagay nito mula sa isang bilog na Ginebra. Matapos maubos ang pulutang limang isaw at limang paa ng manok, sampung mahahabang patpat na pang-barbecue ang natira. Kinayas ito ng tatay ni Utoy para lumambot. Pinagtali-tali. At parang magic, nakabuo ng korteng bituin si Mang Kanor. Nakatulog na rin ito sa papag nila pagkatapos.

Ilang sandali pa ng paghilik ni Mang Kanor, dumating na ang nanay ni Utoy galing palengke. Bumili ito ng mga papel de hapon na kulay puti. Panay ang sermon nito sa tatay ni Utoy habang binabalot ng papel ang iskeleton na bituin. Ewan ni Utoy kung bakit panay ang talak ng nanay niya, eh, tulog na tulog si Mang Kanor sa mga sandaling ‘yun.  Nanay rin niya ang gumawa ng dalawang buntot ng parol na parang dalawang palda na pang-Kastila na may kakaibang patterns. Ikinabit ito ng nanay niya sa mga kanto ng parol na kaiga-igayang tignan lalo na pag-ihip ng hangin. “Eto na anak, may parol ka na,” sabi ni Aling Lidia na parang bumait bigla nang kausapin ang anak. “Ingatan mo para maisabit din natin sa bahay pagkatapos ng Christmas Party n’yo sa eskuwela.” Hinaplos ni Aling Lidia ang buhok ng anak na ikinangiti nilang pareho.

Lahat ng mga kaklase ni Utoy ay ganito rin ang kuwento; merong mga dalang parol kinabukasan na iba-iba ang kulay. Iba-iba ang laki. Iba-iba ang disenyo. Lahat ito gawa ng mga tatay at nanay nila– ng pamilya– dahil ang mga tunay na parol hindi naman nabibili sa tindahan, ginagawa lang bahay.

Ang pinakahihintay ni Utoy sa araw na ito ay ang bunutan para sa “monito-monita”. Gumupit si Miss Kurdapiya ng maliliit na papel at isinulat niya rito ang pangalan ng bawa’t estudyante niya. Umikot sa buong kuwarto si Miss at pinabunot ang bawa’t kaklase ni Utoy sa isang kahon. “Ang mabubunot n’yo ay magiging monito o monita ninyo!” tili ni Miss Kurdapiya na ikinangiwi ng bawat batang nakarinig.

May hiling si Utoy:  Sana mabunot niya ‘yung “crush” niyang si Jocelyn. Maputi, mabait at nasa Row 1 dahil pangalawa sa pinakamatalino sa klase nila. Sa tradisyon kasing ito, may pagkakataon si Utoy na  magregalo sa monita niya ng kung anu-anong bagay sa buong isang linggo bago ang Christmas Party. Bawat araw may theme na ibibigay si Teacher: “Sa Lunes, mamimigay kayo ng ‘Something Sweet’ sa kung sino man ang mabubunot ninyo,’” nakakabinging sabi ni Miss habang papunta sa Row 4, sa tabi ng basurahan, sa upuan ni Utoy.

Isip ni Utoy  agad, “Ah! Chocolate ang ibibigay ko kay Jocelyn! Choc-nut! …Isang plastic!..???

—Mahal yata.–Tatlo na lang, para ‘I Love You.’”

“May sinasabi ka, Utoy?” tanong ni Miss Kurdapiya. “Nagmumura ka na naman?”

“Ah, hindi po ma’am.”

“Bumunot ka na, bago kita mapingot.”

Pumikit si Utoy. Bumunot habang nagdarasal: “Jocelyn…Jocelyn.”

Binuksan niyang dahan-dahan ang nakatuping papel… at napabulong siya ng mahinang “Putang ina…”

Hindi nga lahat ng pangarap natutupad.

Nabunot niya ang pangalan ni Miss Kurdapiya.

“Something sweet… para kay Ma’am?

“Alam ko na:

“PANUTSA!

“…Putsang buhay ‘to, o.”

(parol photo: marexflores.net )

Disyembre 18, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . TIMEtravel. Mag-iwan ng puna.

“BAGETS” baduy but BELOVED

PARA sa akin ang pelikulang “Bagets” ng Viva Films ang pinakakorning pagsusuma ng buhay-tinedyer noong Dekada ’80. Sa sobrang kakornihan nito, natatawa kami ng misis ko tuwing napapanood namin ito sa cable TV. Natatawa pero nagno-nostalgia. Guilty pleasure, ‘eka nga.

 Sunod usong-Bagets din kasi kami noong 1984 (edad-kinse kami noon). At unti-unti kong nadi-discover sa mga kuwentuhang-inuman kasama ng mga kaedad ko ngayon (kuwarenta na kami) na nasaan ka man naroon sa ‘Pinas noong pinalabas ito sa sinehan, malamang pa-bagets-bagets ka rin.

 ‘Eto ang “Ultimate Bagets Quiz” . Kung alam mo ang karamihan sa mga sagot sa tanong na ito, itanggi mo man, ikaw din ang magbibisto sa tunay mong nakaraan: (ANSWERS are at the end of this piece.)

 1. Sino ang kumanta ng theme song ng “Bagets” na may linyang “… I’m growing up, getting down, putting my both feet on the ground…”? Diabetic siya.

 2. Sino sa limang castmembers ng “Bagets” ang nakasalamin? Vice Mayor na siya ngayon.

 3. Sino ang pinakamatandang miyembro ng cast “Bagets” na sa tunay na buhay ay pinakasalan ang ka-love team niya sa pelikulang ito?

 4. Sino ang ka-loveteam ni JC Bonnin sa pelikula?

 5. Ano ang title ng dance anthem ng pelikula? Sinasayaw ito sa pamamagitan ng pagse-shake ng isang nakataas na braso, closed fist ( a la flying Superman), at ang isang kamay naman ay nakatapat sa tenga?

 6. Ano ang sinasakyan ni Herbert Bautista noong nakilala niya si Jobelle Salvador?

 7. Paano namatay ang karakter ni Yayo Aguila?

 8. Anong kanta ni Raymond Lauchengco ang background music sa date sequence nila ni Eula Valdes?

 9. Dalawa sa limang “Bagets” ang walang ka-date sa prom night sequence ng pelikula. Sino sila?

 10. Sinong foreign singer ang ina-idolize ni Aga Muhlach sa movie?

MGA SAGOT:

 1. Sino pa, di si Gary Valenciano. At kung alam mo ang title nito– “Growing Up” — malamang alam mo rin ang buong lyrics.

 2. Si Quezon City Vice-Mayor Herbert Bautista.

 3. Si William Martinez. Kinailangan siyang isama dahil siya ang pinakasikat na heartthrob noon. Malaking risk kasi ang pelikulang puro bago ang artista kaya hiniram siya from Regal Films. Ka-loveteam niya ang misis niya ngayong si Yayo Aguila.

 4. Si Chanda Romero. May-December affair ang drama nila.

 5. “Just Got Lucky” ng Joe Boxers. Hanggang ngayon ito pa rin ang isa sa most identified dance step ‘pag Dekada ’80 ang topic.

 6. Bisekleta ang sinasakyan ni Bistek nu’ng makita niyang nagdidilig ng halaman si Jobelle. Nahulog pa siya nang ma-love at first sight siya sa dalaga. Falling in love, literally.

 7. Namatay sa car crash ang karakter ni Yayo. Nakipag-drag race kasi si William habang angkas siya sa kool na kool nilang dune buggy.

8. Ang walang kamatayang “So It’s You”. Highlight ng sequence na ito ang pagkanta ni Raymond na naka-black tux siya at si Eula naman nasa gitna ng isang malaking staduium (Rizal Memorial?) at nakasuot ng pang-Santacruzang gown. Surreal.

 9. Sina Aga (dahil may asawa na ang love interest niya rito na si Baby Delgado) at si Herbert (dahil sa ending pa ng pelikula niya mapapasagot si Jobelle dahil akala niya boyfriend nito si Mon Alvir– pinsan pala).

 10. Sino pa, si Michael Jackson. Sumayaw pa si Aga ng “Wanna Be Starting Somethin” na tuluyan nang nagpabaduy kay Michael Jackson sa mga Pilipino.
REFLECTION:

Kung napangiti ka ng 8 out of 10 questions dito at alam mo ang sagot mentally (kahit ayaw mong sabihin verbally), naki-“Bagets” ka rin pala noon. At malamang hanggang ngayon, naggi-gel ka pa rin. May nakatago kang Topsiders na pang-driving (lame excuse). At ‘pag natutuwa ka sa sinabi ng isa mong kausap, sasagot ka ng “Nice one! (Sabay apir.)

Kung napag-isip ka ng 5 out of 10 questions dito at habang sinasabi mong “Oo nga, no. Naalala ko na,” closet-“Bagets” ang tawag sa’yo. Pilit mong kinakalimutan ang ’80s. Kasi siguro wala kang kabarkada noon. O wala kang naging boy friend o girl friend. In short, kulang sa pagkabata.

Kung wala kang alam (0 ang score mo), you need to see this flick.

You’re either too young or chromosome ka pa lang noong pinalabas ito:

part 1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fpftOPjJ3I&feature=related

part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PfzlII0L4Y&feature=related

part 3: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=johse1ryNh8&feature=related

part 4: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VJ4JKRXPOs&feature=related

part 5: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGtDqN0gvo0&feature=related

THE REST OF THE MOVIE: Kayo na ang maghanap sa YouTube

(at magpasalamat tayo kay JONETTE salamat sa pag-a-upload ng klasik na ito)

Para maunawaan mo kung bakit may mga pag-uugaling baduy ang parents mo or mga nakakatanda mong kapatid, panoorin mo ito dahil ganito sila noon. Baduy na talaga… pero kool.

Nice one!!! Apppiiir!

(aLjI05)

Nobyembre 9, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . TIMEtravel. 2 mga puna.

TATTOO or FALSE

CB026533

(by ely m.) I also call this entry: “It’s easier to write in English as long as you don’t care about grammar and spelling.”

I HAVE always wanted a tattoo.

When I was 24, I planned to get one to match my Eddie Vedder hair (yes, it was the ‘90s).

But then I also needed an office job, so the hair had to go and without that as an accessory, getting a tattoo would have been pointless.

I was either going to be a rocker for the rest of my life or just be my geeky old self.  

That was 16 years ago today and I have remained a geek.

But I haven’t scratched out “get a tattoo” from my “to-do-list”.

To celebrate my 40th summer, I’ve decided that this is definitely the year.

I was on my way to the tattoo shop when I had this awful toothache.

It was aching like mad; I had to change my plan and went straight to the dentist.

She said I have an infracted tooth that’s pushing against my gums causing this terrible ache.

She said I need tooth extractions—that’s extraction with an “s”—meaning more than one.

If I remember correctly I only have two gum teeth left. So, they both had to go.

How the hell am I going to chew now?

She said she will make for me some dentures.

Or, if I was against that idea, I can  just keep my infected tooth and wait for my cheeks to swell.

That totally isn’t cool.

So, choices: A cool tattoo on my arm or an aching bloated face?

Suddenly, I was back in the ‘90s.

I had tears in my eyes when I said, “Make me some dentures… please.”

She made some molds of my teeth using this green plaster and told me my new dentures will be ready in a couple of days.

“This really is not cool,” I told her while shaking my head in disbelief.

“There’s a way to make it cool,” she answered.

“Put some water and ice in a glass…

“And dip your dentures in it overnight…

That will make it cooler…

“Happy birthday, old man.”

(photo from castlerockdental.com)

Nobyembre 7, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . I THOUGHT utot, WTF is GRAMMAR?!. Mag-iwan ng puna.

Ang NAWAWALANG photos sa ELLAGANDA.COM

(ni Ely M.) MAY isang blogger na nagtanong:

AANHIN PA ANG DAMO KUNG PATAY NA ANG KABAYO?” << < click!

(strangely, hindi ma-download ang photos ni ella sa site niya. kaso kumalat na sa emails– see below)

May isang presidente na sumagot:

“LUZON RELIEF CARAVAN’S DELAY IRKS ARROYO” << < click!

May presidential-alalay na nagngitngit:

“DSWD CRIED FOUL OVER ALLEGATIONS OF HOARDING.” <<< click!

‘Yung mga biktima???

NAGDASAL NA LANG. <<< click!

So, where’s the…

PHOTOS (they did not want you to see) AND CAPTIONS BY ELLAGANDA?

Ito po– kayo na ang humusga:

NOTE from ELLA: “Pinagbawalan kaming kumuha ng photos. I wonder why…”

parang haunted warehouse ang dating copy“Parang haunted warehouse ang dating…”

kahit na daig pa ang tindahan sa divisoria sa dami ng kaldero ng naka-stack copy“Daig pa ang Divisoria sa dami nang naka-stack na kaldero…”

halos matakpan na ang bintana sa dami ng mga kahon copy

“Halos matakpan na ang bintana sa dami ng mga kahon…”

umabot na hanggang kisame ang stack ng mga kahon-- coleman camp beds from the USA ang mga ito-- hindi siya kasama sa mga nire-repack for victims copy

“Umabot na hanggang kisame ang stack ng mga kahon… Imported Coleman Camp Pads from the USA… Hindi ito kasama sa mga ni-repack namin.”

mahiwagang mga kahon from Japan Aid hindi rin ito kasama Imported are not included we concluded copy

“Mahiwagang mga kahon from Japan Aid… Hindi rin ito kasali for repacking… ‘Imported’ is not included we concluded….”

Imported pork and beans from spain hindi rin kasama siyempre copy

“Imported pork and beans from Spain… Sorry hindi pa rin included…”

lets take a look at what the victims will get from dswd copy“Let’s take a look at what a victim will get… Kaldero ang unang ilalagay sa sako. Sabong panglaba at sampung lata ng sardinas sa ilalim. Siyam na sabon sa gilid ng kaldero. LOCAL GOODS lahat siyempre…”

daming kumot

“Tapos papatungan ng tuwalya, SANITARY napkin. Tatlong rolyo ng kumot. Blue water jugs (see first photo). Last but not the least, lalagyan ng dalawang banig.”

at marami pa copy

“Wow! May bagong shipment na naman…”

Sana eleksyon na…

Sana Pasko na…

Para mapunta na sa mga biktima

‘Yung matagal nang ibinigay para sa kanila.

Oktubre 31, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. Mag-iwan ng puna.

‘Di ba ‘pag “PHILIPPINE” dapat PILIPINO?

Blog Awards

(visualfrompinoydoglover.com)

(ni Ely M.) ANG katagang “Philippine” sa Tagalog ay katumbas ng katagang “Pilipinas”.

Sa Pilipinas pinakamarami ay ‘yung nagta-Tagalog, kaya ‘pag sinabing–salita ng “Pilipino” – Tagalog ang ibig sabihin niyan.

Kahit sa abroad ‘pag sinabi nilang “Oh, you’re Filipino—you speak TahGAlogk!”

Karamihan din kasi sa mga Pilipino o Filipino (pagsamahin na natin: F/Pilipino) sa pagkakaalala ko, nagkakaintindihan lang sa salitang Tagalog kahit na saan pang probinsiya ang pinanggalingan nila.

Eklat lang kadalasan ‘yung “You know, I speak in English because my Tagalog is not good.”

Ganu’n din ‘yung iba ‘pag nagsusulat:  “You know, I write in English because my Filipino is not good.”

Yeh,  yur PILIPINO is not good, but who kers?

Nag-isip ako—meron bang nagba-Blog in Fee-lee-pee-know “because their F/Pilipino is good”?

Hinanap ko ang pinakamagagaling na Pinoy Blogs sa Internet.

Kaya nag-Google ako. Tinayp ko: Best Pinoy Blogs…or Best Pilipino Blogs… or Best Filipino Blogs

Pinindot ko ‘yang lahat… isa-isa.

(Wala kasi akong magawa.)

Nadismaya ako.

Wala ni isang best site na nagpi-Pilipino.

Wala ni isang best site na nagta-Tagalog.

Ang huli kong pag-asa:

“The 2009 Philippine Blog Awards.”

Ito raw ang listahan ng pinakamagagaling na F/Pilipino Bloggers sa Pilipinas at sa ibang bansa!!!

‘ETO ang listahan ng mga nanalo.

Pinuntahan ko lahat ng site ng winners.

Magagaling silang lahat–  walang argumento riyan.

Ang mas nadismaya ako…

Bukod sa tuyongtintangbolpen.blogspot.com…  (nanalo ng “Best Post”)

Lahat ng winners hindi nagpi-F/Pilipino.

Lahat  ng winners hindi nagta-Tagalog.

Parang may mali.

Sa dinami-rami ng F/Pilipino bloggers na pagpipilian sa bawat sulok ng mundo na may Pinoy

… isa lang ang nakalusot?!

Para sa akin ngayon, si bolpen ang “Best Blogger of the Philippines.”

Tunay na Pilipino na nagta-Tagalog… nagpi-Filipino… nagpi-Pilipino…

(Teka—hindi ko kilala si Tuyong Tinta Ng Bolpen.

Wala rin akong intensyong makipagkilala.

Wala rin akong intensyon sa kontes na ‘to.

Natutuwa lang ako at pinili siya.)

Sana sa susunod—malamang hiling MO rin ito, oo IKAW na nagbabasa ngayon—

 Mas marami sanang blogs na Tagalog – F/ Pilipino ang manalo.

Para mas maging makatotohanan ‘yung katagang “Philippine” na nakasabit sa mga katagang “Blog Awards”

Dahil ang katotohanan…

Pilipino rin lang naman ang TUNAY  na makakaintindi ng mga pinagsusulat natin.

At kahit mag-type pa tayo ng patiwarik habang nagba-blog in English

puro Pinoy pa rin naman ang pabalik-balik na magbabasa ng mga bagay

at kaisipang tungkol sa Pilipinas at pagiging-Pilipino.

Tama ba ‘ko?

Oras na para i-click

ang “Reply”, “Puna” o “Komento”

Oktubre 30, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 5 mga puna.

Bagong QUALIFICATIONS for PRESIDENTIAL candidates

presidentiables ryanericsongcanlas

(by Ely M.) ANO ba ang kuwalipikasyon para mag-presidente ng Pilipinas?

According sa konstitusyon natin:

“In order to serve as the President of the Philippines one must be…

“A Filipino citizen by birth

“Able to read and write

“A registered voter

“A resident of the Philippines 10 years prior to the elections

“At least 40 years of age.”

Kaya pala ang mga batang musmos noon, ‘pag tinatanong sila

“Ano’ng gusto mong maging paglaki mo?

Sagot nila kadalasan: “Gusto kong maging presidente ng Pilipinas!”

Eh, kasi, madali lang talaga.

Pagkapanganak mo pa lang, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 1.

Magtapos ka lang ng grade three, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 2.

Bago matapos ang pagka-teenager mo, parehistro ka lang sa COMELEC, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 3.

‘Wag ka lang mag-ambisyon na mag-abroad, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 4.

At tumambay ka lang sa kanto hanggang tumanda ka, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 5.

Kadali, ‘di ba?

Pero sa takbo ng situwayon ngayon dapat na yatang baguhin ang limang criteria na ito.

‘Eto na dapat:

“In order to serve as the President of the Philippines one…

“Must be a political clan member by birth or by ambition

“Must be able to hire  family members or family friends to read and write on his/her behalf

“Must be able to pay 200 to 500 pesos per registered voter to win.”

“Must return to the Philippines after spending half-a-lifetime abroad as a double-citizenship cardholder 10 years prior to the elections. Must also be able to flee to his/her mansions abroad during worst case scenarios.

“Must be a self-righteous, self-centered, stubborn adult who’s quite familiar with menopause, mid-life crises and showbusiness.

“And must be able to break Philippine laws and get away with it.”

 (photo from ryanericsongcanlas)

Oktubre 23, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 2 mga puna.

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