“Age” by Larry Miller

(by ely m.) WHILE digging into some more email trash that’s been clogging my yahoo account (been doing this for a couple of months now– I’m sure you’ve noticed if you’re a regular “scannedthoughtero”), I came across this classic philosophical chainmail disguised as internet goobledigook. The thing is, this one actually makes a lot of sense.

And having all the time in the world, I Googled for more info about it: about George Carlin mainly, because it was attributed to this late, great standup comic. Turns out, Carlin was not the author of this standup classic. It was actually Larry Miller.

We all know who George Carlin is (yes, he’s the ponytailed  “Rufus”  in “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure“).

But who the hell is Larry Miller?

He’s the gay guy from “Princess Diaries 1 and 2“– the one who did the makeover for hottie Anne Hattaway.

So, this blog will help hopefully in setting the record straight: That Larry Miller is THE MAN!

And George Carlin had a totally diferent take on “Ageing”.

Here’s the whole Classic Email:

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids?

If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited about aging that you think in fractions. ‘How old are you?’

‘I’m four and A HALF!’

You’re never thirty-six and a half. You’re four and a half, going on five! That’s the key.

You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

‘How old are you?’

 ‘I’m GONNA be 16!’

You could be 13, but hey, you’re gonna be 16!

And then the greatest day of your life ! You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony.

“You BECOME 21. Yesss!!! “

But then you

TURN 30.

Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There’s no fun now, you’re Just a sour-dumpling. What’s wrong? What’s changed?

You BECOME 21

 You TURN 30

then you’re PUSHING 40.

Whoa! Put on the brakes, it’s all slipping away.

Before you know it,

you REACH 50

and your dreams are gone.

 But wait!!!

 You MAKE it to 60.

 You didn’t think you would!

  So you

BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

 You’ve built up so much speed

 that you HIT 70!

 After that it’s a day-by-day thing;

you HIT Wednesday!

 You GET INTO your 80’s

and every day is a complete cycle;

you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime.

And it doesn’t end there.

Into the 90s, you start going backwards;

‘I WAS JUST 92.’

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again.

‘How old are you?’

‘I’m 100 AND A HALF!’

May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!

(Here’s the actual video of Larry doing this bit.)

Here’s George Carlin’s:

And here’s the source that definitely prove where the confusion started:

Case closed.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

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Abril 19, 2010. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Pilosopo PHILOSOPHY, WTF is GRAMMAR?!. 4 mga puna.

Ang NAWAWALANG photos sa ELLAGANDA.COM

(ni Ely M.) MAY isang blogger na nagtanong:

AANHIN PA ANG DAMO KUNG PATAY NA ANG KABAYO?” << < click!

(strangely, hindi ma-download ang photos ni ella sa site niya. kaso kumalat na sa emails– see below)

May isang presidente na sumagot:

“LUZON RELIEF CARAVAN’S DELAY IRKS ARROYO” << < click!

May presidential-alalay na nagngitngit:

“DSWD CRIED FOUL OVER ALLEGATIONS OF HOARDING.” <<< click!

‘Yung mga biktima???

NAGDASAL NA LANG. <<< click!

So, where’s the…

PHOTOS (they did not want you to see) AND CAPTIONS BY ELLAGANDA?

Ito po– kayo na ang humusga:

NOTE from ELLA: “Pinagbawalan kaming kumuha ng photos. I wonder why…”

parang haunted warehouse ang dating copy“Parang haunted warehouse ang dating…”

kahit na daig pa ang tindahan sa divisoria sa dami ng kaldero ng naka-stack copy“Daig pa ang Divisoria sa dami nang naka-stack na kaldero…”

halos matakpan na ang bintana sa dami ng mga kahon copy

“Halos matakpan na ang bintana sa dami ng mga kahon…”

umabot na hanggang kisame ang stack ng mga kahon-- coleman camp beds from the USA ang mga ito-- hindi siya kasama sa mga nire-repack for victims copy

“Umabot na hanggang kisame ang stack ng mga kahon… Imported Coleman Camp Pads from the USA… Hindi ito kasama sa mga ni-repack namin.”

mahiwagang mga kahon from Japan Aid hindi rin ito kasama Imported are not included we concluded copy

“Mahiwagang mga kahon from Japan Aid… Hindi rin ito kasali for repacking… ‘Imported’ is not included we concluded….”

Imported pork and beans from spain hindi rin kasama siyempre copy

“Imported pork and beans from Spain… Sorry hindi pa rin included…”

lets take a look at what the victims will get from dswd copy“Let’s take a look at what a victim will get… Kaldero ang unang ilalagay sa sako. Sabong panglaba at sampung lata ng sardinas sa ilalim. Siyam na sabon sa gilid ng kaldero. LOCAL GOODS lahat siyempre…”

daming kumot

“Tapos papatungan ng tuwalya, SANITARY napkin. Tatlong rolyo ng kumot. Blue water jugs (see first photo). Last but not the least, lalagyan ng dalawang banig.”

at marami pa copy

“Wow! May bagong shipment na naman…”

Sana eleksyon na…

Sana Pasko na…

Para mapunta na sa mga biktima

‘Yung matagal nang ibinigay para sa kanila.

Oktubre 31, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. Mag-iwan ng puna.

‘Di ba ‘pag “PHILIPPINE” dapat PILIPINO?

Blog Awards

(visualfrompinoydoglover.com)

(ni Ely M.) ANG katagang “Philippine” sa Tagalog ay katumbas ng katagang “Pilipinas”.

Sa Pilipinas pinakamarami ay ‘yung nagta-Tagalog, kaya ‘pag sinabing–salita ng “Pilipino” – Tagalog ang ibig sabihin niyan.

Kahit sa abroad ‘pag sinabi nilang “Oh, you’re Filipino—you speak TahGAlogk!”

Karamihan din kasi sa mga Pilipino o Filipino (pagsamahin na natin: F/Pilipino) sa pagkakaalala ko, nagkakaintindihan lang sa salitang Tagalog kahit na saan pang probinsiya ang pinanggalingan nila.

Eklat lang kadalasan ‘yung “You know, I speak in English because my Tagalog is not good.”

Ganu’n din ‘yung iba ‘pag nagsusulat:  “You know, I write in English because my Filipino is not good.”

Yeh,  yur PILIPINO is not good, but who kers?

Nag-isip ako—meron bang nagba-Blog in Fee-lee-pee-know “because their F/Pilipino is good”?

Hinanap ko ang pinakamagagaling na Pinoy Blogs sa Internet.

Kaya nag-Google ako. Tinayp ko: Best Pinoy Blogs…or Best Pilipino Blogs… or Best Filipino Blogs

Pinindot ko ‘yang lahat… isa-isa.

(Wala kasi akong magawa.)

Nadismaya ako.

Wala ni isang best site na nagpi-Pilipino.

Wala ni isang best site na nagta-Tagalog.

Ang huli kong pag-asa:

“The 2009 Philippine Blog Awards.”

Ito raw ang listahan ng pinakamagagaling na F/Pilipino Bloggers sa Pilipinas at sa ibang bansa!!!

‘ETO ang listahan ng mga nanalo.

Pinuntahan ko lahat ng site ng winners.

Magagaling silang lahat–  walang argumento riyan.

Ang mas nadismaya ako…

Bukod sa tuyongtintangbolpen.blogspot.com…  (nanalo ng “Best Post”)

Lahat ng winners hindi nagpi-F/Pilipino.

Lahat  ng winners hindi nagta-Tagalog.

Parang may mali.

Sa dinami-rami ng F/Pilipino bloggers na pagpipilian sa bawat sulok ng mundo na may Pinoy

… isa lang ang nakalusot?!

Para sa akin ngayon, si bolpen ang “Best Blogger of the Philippines.”

Tunay na Pilipino na nagta-Tagalog… nagpi-Filipino… nagpi-Pilipino…

(Teka—hindi ko kilala si Tuyong Tinta Ng Bolpen.

Wala rin akong intensyong makipagkilala.

Wala rin akong intensyon sa kontes na ‘to.

Natutuwa lang ako at pinili siya.)

Sana sa susunod—malamang hiling MO rin ito, oo IKAW na nagbabasa ngayon—

 Mas marami sanang blogs na Tagalog – F/ Pilipino ang manalo.

Para mas maging makatotohanan ‘yung katagang “Philippine” na nakasabit sa mga katagang “Blog Awards”

Dahil ang katotohanan…

Pilipino rin lang naman ang TUNAY  na makakaintindi ng mga pinagsusulat natin.

At kahit mag-type pa tayo ng patiwarik habang nagba-blog in English

puro Pinoy pa rin naman ang pabalik-balik na magbabasa ng mga bagay

at kaisipang tungkol sa Pilipinas at pagiging-Pilipino.

Tama ba ‘ko?

Oras na para i-click

ang “Reply”, “Puna” o “Komento”

Oktubre 30, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 5 mga puna.