Where is Pinoy Pride? I’ll tell you where…

SOMEONE named Tess Underwood uploaded a question in “Yahoo! Answers” that’s very demeaning to Filipinos. Here’s a copy:

Here’s the actual page: CLICK THIS.

The problem with this entry is that if you Google “Pinoy Pride”, it comes out as the second item in the Google search list (right after the Pinoy Pride Network site).

This negative opinion has become the second reference material for Pinoy Pride searches on line.

Which is quite unfair to all Filipinos and the Philippines.

I got so pissed, I wanted to give my Yahoo answer but the page has closed.

Tess has accepted and gave a high rating to an answer that affirms her distorted beliefs (you can see it there).

So, I’ve decided to post my answer, my scanned thoughts, here.

I am proud to be a Filipino and I will try to answer ALL her opinions one by one to enlighten her on what being a Filipino is really about:

Opinion 1: Filipinos always brag to be part Chinese, part American, part Dutch, part Korean, part Japanese, part Spanish. I have yet to meet one that says they are proud to be….Filipino.

My answer: If you know about the rich history of the Filipinos, you would not even ask this question. Filipinos are part African, Indonesian, Malaysian, Chinese, Spanish, American, Japanese, Arab, Korean, Australian and European.

The original “Filipinos” were the dark-skinned Negritos who walked all the way from Africa when the Pangaea continent still existed (we still have some of these ethnic Filipinos in Subic; you also see them in Manila during Christmas). Next to come were the Indones (from Indonesia) who brought their culture and language to our land, that’s why we have a lot of similar customs and traditions with them (our ancient handwriting, a lot of Filipino words, the the musical instruments angklung and gamelan). Last were the Malays (from Malaysia) who brought the Muslim religion to Southern Philippines. Later the Chinese traders came, who passed in our islands to trade with the Indones and Malays. When we were colonized by Spain, they gave our islands the collective name “Islas Filipinas” and the island natives were called “Filipino” after King Philip of Spain. That’s why Rizal—who is Filipino—is also half-Chinese.

So, even before the Spaniards came in the 1500s, we have been a rich mixture of different races; that’s what makes us different. That’s why we are also one of the most beautiful races in the world. That’s why the Westerners, the Arabs and other Asian countries fall in love with our Pinay beauties, court them and later marry them for keeps. That’s also why we have the Fil-American-Arab-European-Korean-Japanese children who are all products of post WW II inter-racial marriages brought about by war/ tourism/business/jobs abroad.

Remember, these are very open-minded foreigners who have chosen to marry Pinays against the accepted norms of their own societies. So, it’s a sacrifice for both husband and wife; it’s also a bit confusing for us, the products of these unions. However,  we have to be proud of this fact—that being Filipino is being part of another race– that we were able to survive all those challenges in our history to produce a racial breed that is culturally, beautifully, intellectually, creatively mixed and diverse.

Only Nazis would strictly tolerate a society of pure breeds. And you should know how that idea ended.

Read up:  http://philippines-timeline.com/spanish.htm

Opinion 2: 100% of the ‘famous Filipino’ actors and models, are only 1/4th Filipino.

My answer: This is a baseless generalization. You need to give specific names of these “famous Filipinos” before you insinuate that your statements are factual. What is true in the context of Philippine show business today is that a lot of these “famous actors and models” use the term Filipino because they are trying to work in the Philippines as actors and models or would want to get a fan base in the Philippines. If they present themselves as foreigners, they might not get hired, because by then the Department of Foreign Affairs would require them a work permit which will cost them and their employers a lot of money. Certainly the common Pinoy Fan wouldn’t want to idolize them for being too-Hollywood. So, it’s not about Pinoy Pride; it’s more about show-Business. I guess if you think they don’t deserve to be called Filipinos, the best way for you to handle your personal baggage against them is to boycott whatever products or programmes they endorse. Otherwise just let them earn a living.

Here’s a better list of certified “famous Filipino” celebrities:

http://www.famousfilipino.com/content/view/263/138/

Opinion 3: All the products in the Philippines say “export quality”. That means it’s so good, it’s good for foreigners. Shouldn’t it say ‘Pinoy quality’?

My answer: If you are going to talk about products from the Philippines from a business perspective and you would want to successfully market that product internationally, the term “export quality” would be the best description. You need to use words that everybody in the world would understand so that they would buy your product. Also remember, most of these exports are produced and marketed in a free market system that involves plenty of sharing of ideas, raw materials and investments from our partner countries, so why should Pinoys take all the credit? You should think globally if you’re selling to a global market.

From  http://www.philexport.ph/philippines-economy

“The Philippines exports continue with its upward trend throughout 2012. While US and Japan have remained the country’s two largest export markets, China and ASEAN countries have grown in importance. Other key markets include Hong Kong, Germany, Netherlands, South Korea, France and India.”

Opinion 4: Almost all of the products have Japanese, Chinese, English, or Korean writing. Giving the impression that these products are exported. With the exception of San Miguel products, Philippines products ARE NOT exported. It is mere faux Japanese, and faux Chinese.

My answer: If these are “faux Japanese and faux Chinese”, then the manufacturers have just wasted a large amount of their printing budget. Do you think any businessman would spend for something that will not have any purpose? In advertising, the more text and colour you put in the label design the more production cost you incur. I think you should be happy when you see foreign words in the items you consume because it means you have been being given an opportunity to taste what the rest of the world are having. These are authentic products for export—usually they are production overruns (sobra). So, some of them end up in the local markets even if they’re not supposed to.

From http://www.foodexport.org/Resources/CountryProfileDetail.cfm?ItemNumber=1030

“The Philippines is fast becoming a regional staging area for foreign food manufacturers that seek to penetrate the lucrative East and South East Asian market for processed products. This country has been identified for the ability of its workforce to manufacture high quality, differentiated or niche-market, and high valued products using both domestic and duty-free imported raw materials.”

Opinion 5: Courtship, Filipino style: If Filipinos had pride, then why do the girls here scream and beg to be with any foreigner who happens to walk down the street? Why does everyone here offer their niece, daughter, sister, grand daughter, etc. for marriage to a total stranger, so long as he is foreign? Even if the girl is a teenager, and the foreigner is a 200 kilo, 73 year old in a wheelchair? Why do people offer their children for sex, as young as 5?

My answer: If you’re talking about prostitution and sex trade, why are you focussing only on Filipinos? This “system” is legal in 50% of all countries in the world. It is even illegal in the Philippines! Do not generalize that everyone in the Philippines does it. If you’re talking about our 101,833,938 Filipino citizens nationwide, how much of that number do you think “scream and beg to be with any foreigner who happens to walk down the street”?

Prostitution—the oldest profession in the world– is a common story in all countries where poverty is very high and strict traditions are followed. It’s even worst in Eastern Europe (with their economy going to the dumps). It’s been happening in the Arab world, Africa, India, Japan and China for centuries (with their arranged marriages to privileged men in exchange for land and cattle). Even the crack addicts in the United States are doing the same thing (most of the time they don’t even get married—they just sell sex, later to buy drugs). It’s not the country, its poverty. And there are a lot of poor people all over the world, not only in the Philippines, if no one has told you yet.

Read up:

http://prostitution.procon.org/view.resource.php?resourceID=000772#afghanistan

Opinion 6: If they have pride, then why do they charge dishonest prices at the wet market?

My answer: It’s not dishonest. It’s called price mark-ups. In the business of selling, you need capital to buy or create your product. To be able to make a profit out of that product you need to sell it at a price that is more than your capital. Some prices are intentionally high at wet markets because it’s also a common practice to haggle with the customer to come up with an acceptable price for both the vendor and the buyer. And yes, like all your previous assumptions, it does not only happen in the Philippines. If you think, its way overpriced, then go to the nearest police station or barangay hall or a DTI Office and have the vendor arrested.

Watch one man’s experience in Bali, INDONESIA:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLTfyjUk3mQ

Opinion 7: Where is the pride, when, if a foreigner goes out in public, everyone smiles, points, stares, and shouts at them. Tries to pawn off stolen goods, or over-priced goods. Or yells rude, inappropriate things?

My answer: Clearly you’ve never been to New York City, USA where illegal vendors, who are also irritating to the public is a big problem:

Click this source>> http://www.dnainfo.com/new-york/20120608/soho/city-should-overhaul-complex-street-vendor-laws-police-say

Or INDIA, where everyone in the market place “smiles, points, stares, and shouts…tries to pawn off stolen goods, or over-priced goods. Or yells rude, inappropriate things”.

Click this proof >> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDBoyX17QBM

Again—Not only in the Philippines!!!

Opinion 8: Finally, If the Philippine is so great, then why is it everyone’s dream to get out, and move to another country? The Philippines is a tiny nation, yet 50,000, FIFTY THOUSAND, migrate to the USA alone, PER YEAR. That’s just one nation. Let alone Australia, UK, Japan, etc. 2,500 Filipinos migrate out of their country-PER DAY. That’s over a MILLION per yer. If the Philippines is the best place on Earth, why leave?

My answer: Where did you get this stupid information? 50,000 people a year?! How? The Philippines is not even on the global list of countries with the highest migration rate. In Qatar, only 10% of their citizens are staying in their country to work. 90% of the Qataris are staying out of their country. Does that mean they don’t like being in their country?

Click this source:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_net_migration_rate

Do you know why were not on the list? It’s actually very hard for Filipinos to leave the country with all the paperwork alone (legal or otherwise), not to mention the enormous cost.  Migrating is very expensive. And do you know how hard it is for Filipinos to change citizenship abroad? If you speak to all the Filipinos who are now abroad, if given a choice, they would rather come back and die old in the Philippines. But why do the eager ones leave? It’s because we get higher salaries abroad. Why, because we Filipinos have a highly regarded international reputation as very hardworking, loyal and intelligent. We leave to work and get paid well, but surely we will be back home again.

Opinion 9: There. Only a few things to look at. I’m not racist, nor political. I just think it would be better if Filipinos said “okay, this place sucks, but…..”. Instead of making it seem like the paradise that it’s not.

I am really quite curious about this. ‘Pinoy Pride’ is something in-yo-face every day here, but where is it REALLY? Any constructive feedback? Salamat po!

My answer: If indeed you are Filipino (as you claim to be), and you love your country (as you seem to insinuate) then you should be proud of your country and your countrymen. We should always say WE ARE PROUD OF THE PHILIPPINES because in the end, even if you say “it sucks” it’s the only country we have. It’s the only home for the Filipinos. It’s the only paradise for Proud Filipinos.

Truth be told, you will never feel totally accepted anywhere else in the world except in your own country. You will never be treated as an equal by another race in their own country. Ask anyone who have been abroad.

Sad to say– you are racist, political and very ignorant.

But it’s not too late.

I hope I have helped you change your mind set about your country and your countrymen.

If I haven’t, then shame on you.

And everyone else who agree with you.
MABUHAY ANG PILIPINAS!

MABUHAY ANG MGA PILIPINO!

(aLJI, June 2012)

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Hunyo 15, 2012. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation, WTF is GRAMMAR?!. Mag-iwan ng puna.

Capt. Peter Harrison and Edmiston Yacht Club Scam Letters

LETTER NO. 1

Dear POTENTIAL VICTIM,

My name is Capt. Peter Harrison, from United Kingdom. I work with Edmiston Yachting Company in United Kingdom. I came across your profile on Facebook and decided to mail to ask if you’ll be interested in a job. We are a privately owned yachting company, and the destination is always from Essex London to Ireland, Portsmouth and North-East Europe. Accommodation will be provided by the company.

Hope to hear from you if you are intrested.

Reply to: captpeterharrison@yahoo.com

Also, we want to use this medium to inform you that other vacancies are available, so therefore do let us know if you have an interest in working in any of the areas in which Edmiston Yachting Company Job Offers. Below are the Vacancies:

*Engineer *Captain *Stew work *Mate Engineer *Deckhand *First Mate *Stewardess *Chef *Steward *Chef Stew *Cook Stew *Stewardess *Masseuse *2nd Engineer *Waiter *Customer Care Representatives *Guest Room Attendants *Cleaners *Estate-managers *Head Housekeepers *Gardeners *Housekeepers *House-managers *Maternity Nurse *Lady’s Maids *Butlers *Cooks/Chefs *Mother’s Help *Caretakers *Nannies *Chauffeurs *Tutors *Private Bodyguards *Governess

Job Salary: Depending on your roll of specialization, Salary Ranging from 4, 500.00 GBP to 8, 500.00 GBP or negotiable and We shall take care of your Transportation expenses, Accommodation, feeding and a month training on arrival.

If you are interested to work with us in any position, please kindly send your resume to our via e-mail (captpeterharrison.yahoo.com) immediately with your personal details including your roll of profession/Skill of Specialization.

Regards

Capt. Peter Harrison 

(POTENTIAL VICTIM SENDS HIS/HER RESUME)

LETTER NO. 2

Dear POTENTIAL VICTIM,
We appreciate your interest in working with us and we have open an application file with reference number XXXX/UK/XXX/SEA/XXXX. We have gone through your CV and We found the post of  XXXXXXX  for you with salary amount of X,XXX GB Pounds per month.The destination is always from  London, France,Ireland,Belgium,Norway,Wales and USA.

Benefit:
The company will provide free accommodation ,Insurance (NIN) ,Flight Ticket,Tax Free and many more benefit you will see in your Appointment Letter.

Working Schedule:
Working Days & time: Monday to Friday: 8:00 AM – 6:00PM (GMT)

Saturday & Sunday:  10:00 Am – 4:00 PM (GMT)

Shift Time: Morning and Night.

Contract Period: 2 Years contract and it can be extended if only you wish to remain with our company

Vacation : 3 Month Vacation Interval for you to visit your love ones and family back home

As a notice of acceptance of job offer , we shall send you appointment and invitation letter for you to sign and return the sign copy back to us for record purpose . so therefore kindly let us know if you are satisfy with the salary rate above in order for us to proceed further.

We await to hear from you ASAP. 
Regards
Capt Peter Harrison

(POTENTIAL VICTIM SENDS A REPLY LETTER

SAYING HE/SHE IS MORE THAN SATISFIED WITH THE OFFER)

LETTER NO. 3

Dear POTENTIAL VICTIM,
 We want to use this opportunity in congratulating you in advance for accepting to join our company. How soon do you want to come or can you make it down here within the next two week as we are urgently in need of you to arrive here as soon as possible .If you know it is possible for you to arrive here within the next two weeks , kindly find attached to this mail job interview questionnaire for you to fill and submit back to us so that it will speed up the process of your appointment letter.

We advice you to keep record of your application reference number and we hope you are not attached to any company presently so that you will focus on your job application as we are highly  in need of you to arrive here soon, if not kindly let us know now before you sign any contract agreement with us.If yes we suggest that you start writing your resignation now to whom ever you are working for, so that you can pay more attention to your new job ,if only you are really serious about this job offer..

*Full Name:
*Present Location:
*Nationality
*Date of Birth :
*Phone Number:

We await your immediate response to this mail.
Regards 
Capt Peter Harrison

(POTENTIAL VICTIM ANSWERS THE JOB INTERVIEW FORM AND SENDS IT BACK. PREPARES HIS/HER RESIGNATION LETTER)

4th LETTER

Dear  POTENTIAL VICTIM,
 Attached to this mail is your appointment letter , you are to carefully go through this appointment letter and make sure you have a thorough understanding of the terms and conditions contained therein because your signing it translates to your acceptance of the terms and condition contained therein and they will be binding on you throughout your contract stay with us . You are to sign the appointment by printing out only the last page of the appointment document, then write your signature and date at the appropriate spaces provided and send back to us via email for record purpose.

Since you are convince that you will arrive here within 2 week from now..we dont need to delay much time as your service is highly needed ..so therefore after receiving the Sign appointment letter , we shall proceed with the preparation of your traveling document. Please kindly inform us of the date you want us to fix on your flight ticket.

Congratulations on your success
Regards
Capt. Peter Harrison

(POTENTIAL VICTIM RECEIVES THIS LETTER.) 

(SIGNS THE APPOINTMENT LETTER. STARTS PACKING HIS/HER BAGS)

5th LETTER

Dear POTENTIAL VICTIM,
  We have received your signed appointment letter .We have recorded the document to your application file number of XXXX/UK/XXX/SEA/XXXX. So therefore to proceed further , attached to this mail is your Invitation Letter. We were at the Airport today to make arrangement for the booking of your flight ticket, but they did not allow us because they were requesting for your Valid U.K Visa Number (Traveling Document) and also the nearest airport name close to your location.so therefore you are require to forward a copy of the invitation to the British Embassy for the processing of your traveling document. This is very important because without the document , they will not allow you to pass the boarder and gain entry to work and live in United Kingdom . Remember that we are offering you a contract of 2 years , so remember to inform them as well. Follow our instruction carefully and we assure you that they will grant you ,your Traveling Document.

below is the details of Immigration Office .

UNITED KINGDOM IMMIGRATION SERVICES
E-Mail:   visa.immigration@consultant.com
Contact Person: Mr Gordon F. Rutherford
Designation: HEAD OF VISA/PERMITS OPERATIONS.

Kindly contact the above office via email (visa.immigration@consultant.com) and let them know that you’ve been offered a job from Capt. Peter Harrison.Kindly explain to them that should assist you in processing your Traveling Document (UK Visa) and make sure you do this as soon as you receive this mail so that it will be done before end of this week in order for you to depart and arrive here as soon as you have the complete traveling document deliver to you.

Update us with the process between you and the British Embassy so that we can also follow along as to the date your traveling document will be ready so that we can book for your flight ticket and please don’t forget to provide us with the nearest airport name close to your location.

Congratulations on your success.
Regards
Capt. Peter Harrison

 POTENTIAL VICTIM GETS ADVICE TO GOOGLE FOR SOME INFO ABOUT THE COMPANY
 
 AND FINDS THESE:
 
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110204065514AA741im

http://jobs.classifieds1000.com/United_Kingdom/Hospitality_Jobs/40495-Edmiston_Yacht_Hotel_Job_Offer

http://www.ecademy.com/module.php?mod=club&t=955949

http://www.workonaboat.com/boatcrew/how-avoid-yacht-crew-scammers-275.html

 

BUMMER.

 

How can you determine if a job offer is legitimate?–  by Lee Gallacher:

1. First, look for misspellings and bad grammar in the body of their email.

2. If a passport agency or recruitment agency has a yahoo, googlemail, consult.com (in this instance) and not a dedicated mail server, it is most likely a scam.

3. Do not scan and email your passport, personal data or passport photos. Demand a physical address with offer of FedEx the requested information. Most likely, they will request you to scam and email your data. And if a physical address is proffered, match it to the IP location to insure it is a match.

5. Never EVER send money to an agency. If a company asks for “processing fees, document fees;” it is a scam. These scam artists like to use Western Union, which is a tip-off.

6. When on a public forum, NEVER publish your email address.

7. If there is a request to click on a link, first, run your cursor over the link. A small window will show the actual link. In a scam, the address in the link does not match the link in the body of the email; another sign of scam. Opening such a link may infect your computer with a virus, spybot or Trojan horse.

The proliferation of identity and monetary theft is very real on the internet.  Be cautious when replying to job offers.

POTENTIAL VICTIM WRITES A BLOG ABOUT IT. 

 YOU’VE JUST READ IT.

Marso 2, 2011. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 2 mga puna.

BAKIT may KRISIS sa negosyo?

NAGBABAWAS ako ng emails na pinorward sa akin ng  kung sinu-sino.  Unti-unti kong ilalagay ang lahat dito sa “scannedthoughts” ‘yung mga ita-trash ko na.

 ‘Eka nga, “Reduce, Reuse and Recycle.”

This entry ay listahan ng mga entrepreneurial attempt ng ilan nating kababayan.

Listahan ng business names ng mga negosyong either sarado na ngayon o patuloy na  nalulugi.

Obvious naman siguro ang dahilan:

 
  1. A parlor in San Juan is named “Cut & Face”.
  2. Wholesaler of balut in Sto.Tomas, Batangas: “Starduck”.
  3. Fast food eatery in Nueva Ecija: “Violybee”
  4. Internet cafe opened among squatters named “Cafe Pindot”.
  5. In Manila , there’s a laundry named, “Summa Cum Laundry”.
  6. Petshop in Ortigas: “Pussies and Bitches”.
  7. A pet shop in Kamuning: “Pakita Mo Pet Mo”.
  8. Bakery: “Bread Pit”.
  9. Bank in Alabang: “Alabank”.
  10. Restaurant in Pampanga named, “Mekeni Rogers”.
  11. Restaurant in Pasig : “Johnnny’s Fried Chicken: The ‘Fried’ of Mrikina”.
  12. A boxing gym: “Blow Jab”.
  13. A tombstone maker in Antipolo: “Lito Lapida”.
  14. A copy center in Sikatuna Village called “Pakopya ni Edgar”.
  15. A beerhouse in Cavite called, “Chickpoint”.
  16. Laundromat in Sikatuna: ” Star Wash : Attack of the Clothes”.
  17. Internet cafe in Taguig named, “n@kopi@”.
  18. Name of a kambingan, “Sa Goat Kita”.
  19. A salon somewhere, “Curl Up And Dye”.
  20. A lugawan in Sta. Maria, Bulacan: “Gee Congee”.
  21. A water refilling station in Dapitan named “Wa-Thirst”.
  22. A store selling feeds for chickens: “Robocock”.
  23. Shoe repair in Marikina : “Dr. Shoe-Bago”.
  24. Shoe repair store along Commonwealth, “SHOEPERMAN: we will HEEL you, save your SOLE, and even DYE for you”.
  25. Petshop: “Petness First”
  26. Flower shop: “Susan’s Roses”.
  27. Taxicab: “Income Taxi”.
  28. A 2nd hand watch store: “2nd Time Around”.
  29. A squid stall in a wet market: “Pusit to the Limit”.
  30. A shrimp store: “Hipon Coming Back”.
  31. A gay lawyer’s extension office: ” Nota Republic “.
  32. A ceiling installer: ” Kisame Street “.
  33. A car repair shop: “Bangga ka ‘day?”
  34. An aquatic pet store in Malolos: “Fish Be With You”.
  35. A fishball cart named, “Poke-Poke”.
  36. A beauty salon: “Saudia Hairlines”.
  37. A bakery: “Anak Ng Tinapay”.
  38. A resto along Mayon road in Manila : “May-Lisa Eatery”.
  39. Laundry shop: “Wash Your Problem”.
  40. This mobile massage business name isn’t funny, but
their slogan is: “Asian Mobile Massage Service: Massage only, God is watching”.
  41. Ice cream parlor: “Dila Lang Ang Katapat”.
  42. Chicharon store: “Chicha Hut”.
  43. Neighborhood pizza store: “Pizza Hot”.
  44. A fishball cart near UST: “Eat My Balls”.
  45. A barbershop in Cagayan de Oro: “Pinoy Big Barber”.
  46. A Resto: “The Last Supper”.
  47. A goto resto: “Goto Ko Pa!”
  48. A peanut vendor’s cart with a funny name: “Mani ni Mama”.
  49. A gym in Malolos: ” Gaymann Fitness Center “.
  50. My brother’s party needs business: “Balloon-Balloonan”.
  51. A Chinese restaurant in Pasig : “Lah-Fang”.
  52. A store selling fresh chicken, owned by woman named Dina: “Dina Fresh Chicken”.
  53. An actual bait and tackle shop in U.S. : “The Master Baiter”.
  54. Panaderia: “Trimonay Bakeshop”.
  55. Salon: “Hair Dot Comb”.

Dadagdagan ko na ng mga nakita ko kamakailan…

56. Carenderia sa QC: “Cooking ng Ina Mo!”

57. Lugawan sa Cabanatuan: “Hilton” (dahil ‘yung mga tindero HILa nila ‘yung kariTON)

58. Sastre sa Pasig: “James Tailor”

59. Manghuhula sa Quiapo: “Deep Truth”

60. Xerox shop sa Las Pinas: “Fax Me”

 

 

DISCLAIMER:

 photo: Google Images

text and idea: Nos. 1-55,  definitely NOT MINE. All the rest is original.

Marso 15, 2010. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 3 mga puna.

Ang NAWAWALANG photos sa ELLAGANDA.COM

(ni Ely M.) MAY isang blogger na nagtanong:

AANHIN PA ANG DAMO KUNG PATAY NA ANG KABAYO?” << < click!

(strangely, hindi ma-download ang photos ni ella sa site niya. kaso kumalat na sa emails– see below)

May isang presidente na sumagot:

“LUZON RELIEF CARAVAN’S DELAY IRKS ARROYO” << < click!

May presidential-alalay na nagngitngit:

“DSWD CRIED FOUL OVER ALLEGATIONS OF HOARDING.” <<< click!

‘Yung mga biktima???

NAGDASAL NA LANG. <<< click!

So, where’s the…

PHOTOS (they did not want you to see) AND CAPTIONS BY ELLAGANDA?

Ito po– kayo na ang humusga:

NOTE from ELLA: “Pinagbawalan kaming kumuha ng photos. I wonder why…”

parang haunted warehouse ang dating copy“Parang haunted warehouse ang dating…”

kahit na daig pa ang tindahan sa divisoria sa dami ng kaldero ng naka-stack copy“Daig pa ang Divisoria sa dami nang naka-stack na kaldero…”

halos matakpan na ang bintana sa dami ng mga kahon copy

“Halos matakpan na ang bintana sa dami ng mga kahon…”

umabot na hanggang kisame ang stack ng mga kahon-- coleman camp beds from the USA ang mga ito-- hindi siya kasama sa mga nire-repack for victims copy

“Umabot na hanggang kisame ang stack ng mga kahon… Imported Coleman Camp Pads from the USA… Hindi ito kasama sa mga ni-repack namin.”

mahiwagang mga kahon from Japan Aid hindi rin ito kasama Imported are not included we concluded copy

“Mahiwagang mga kahon from Japan Aid… Hindi rin ito kasali for repacking… ‘Imported’ is not included we concluded….”

Imported pork and beans from spain hindi rin kasama siyempre copy

“Imported pork and beans from Spain… Sorry hindi pa rin included…”

lets take a look at what the victims will get from dswd copy“Let’s take a look at what a victim will get… Kaldero ang unang ilalagay sa sako. Sabong panglaba at sampung lata ng sardinas sa ilalim. Siyam na sabon sa gilid ng kaldero. LOCAL GOODS lahat siyempre…”

daming kumot

“Tapos papatungan ng tuwalya, SANITARY napkin. Tatlong rolyo ng kumot. Blue water jugs (see first photo). Last but not the least, lalagyan ng dalawang banig.”

at marami pa copy

“Wow! May bagong shipment na naman…”

Sana eleksyon na…

Sana Pasko na…

Para mapunta na sa mga biktima

‘Yung matagal nang ibinigay para sa kanila.

Oktubre 31, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. Mag-iwan ng puna.

‘Di ba ‘pag “PHILIPPINE” dapat PILIPINO?

Blog Awards

(visualfrompinoydoglover.com)

(ni Ely M.) ANG katagang “Philippine” sa Tagalog ay katumbas ng katagang “Pilipinas”.

Sa Pilipinas pinakamarami ay ‘yung nagta-Tagalog, kaya ‘pag sinabing–salita ng “Pilipino” – Tagalog ang ibig sabihin niyan.

Kahit sa abroad ‘pag sinabi nilang “Oh, you’re Filipino—you speak TahGAlogk!”

Karamihan din kasi sa mga Pilipino o Filipino (pagsamahin na natin: F/Pilipino) sa pagkakaalala ko, nagkakaintindihan lang sa salitang Tagalog kahit na saan pang probinsiya ang pinanggalingan nila.

Eklat lang kadalasan ‘yung “You know, I speak in English because my Tagalog is not good.”

Ganu’n din ‘yung iba ‘pag nagsusulat:  “You know, I write in English because my Filipino is not good.”

Yeh,  yur PILIPINO is not good, but who kers?

Nag-isip ako—meron bang nagba-Blog in Fee-lee-pee-know “because their F/Pilipino is good”?

Hinanap ko ang pinakamagagaling na Pinoy Blogs sa Internet.

Kaya nag-Google ako. Tinayp ko: Best Pinoy Blogs…or Best Pilipino Blogs… or Best Filipino Blogs

Pinindot ko ‘yang lahat… isa-isa.

(Wala kasi akong magawa.)

Nadismaya ako.

Wala ni isang best site na nagpi-Pilipino.

Wala ni isang best site na nagta-Tagalog.

Ang huli kong pag-asa:

“The 2009 Philippine Blog Awards.”

Ito raw ang listahan ng pinakamagagaling na F/Pilipino Bloggers sa Pilipinas at sa ibang bansa!!!

‘ETO ang listahan ng mga nanalo.

Pinuntahan ko lahat ng site ng winners.

Magagaling silang lahat–  walang argumento riyan.

Ang mas nadismaya ako…

Bukod sa tuyongtintangbolpen.blogspot.com…  (nanalo ng “Best Post”)

Lahat ng winners hindi nagpi-F/Pilipino.

Lahat  ng winners hindi nagta-Tagalog.

Parang may mali.

Sa dinami-rami ng F/Pilipino bloggers na pagpipilian sa bawat sulok ng mundo na may Pinoy

… isa lang ang nakalusot?!

Para sa akin ngayon, si bolpen ang “Best Blogger of the Philippines.”

Tunay na Pilipino na nagta-Tagalog… nagpi-Filipino… nagpi-Pilipino…

(Teka—hindi ko kilala si Tuyong Tinta Ng Bolpen.

Wala rin akong intensyong makipagkilala.

Wala rin akong intensyon sa kontes na ‘to.

Natutuwa lang ako at pinili siya.)

Sana sa susunod—malamang hiling MO rin ito, oo IKAW na nagbabasa ngayon—

 Mas marami sanang blogs na Tagalog – F/ Pilipino ang manalo.

Para mas maging makatotohanan ‘yung katagang “Philippine” na nakasabit sa mga katagang “Blog Awards”

Dahil ang katotohanan…

Pilipino rin lang naman ang TUNAY  na makakaintindi ng mga pinagsusulat natin.

At kahit mag-type pa tayo ng patiwarik habang nagba-blog in English

puro Pinoy pa rin naman ang pabalik-balik na magbabasa ng mga bagay

at kaisipang tungkol sa Pilipinas at pagiging-Pilipino.

Tama ba ‘ko?

Oras na para i-click

ang “Reply”, “Puna” o “Komento”

Oktubre 30, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 5 mga puna.

Bagong QUALIFICATIONS for PRESIDENTIAL candidates

presidentiables ryanericsongcanlas

(by Ely M.) ANO ba ang kuwalipikasyon para mag-presidente ng Pilipinas?

According sa konstitusyon natin:

“In order to serve as the President of the Philippines one must be…

“A Filipino citizen by birth

“Able to read and write

“A registered voter

“A resident of the Philippines 10 years prior to the elections

“At least 40 years of age.”

Kaya pala ang mga batang musmos noon, ‘pag tinatanong sila

“Ano’ng gusto mong maging paglaki mo?

Sagot nila kadalasan: “Gusto kong maging presidente ng Pilipinas!”

Eh, kasi, madali lang talaga.

Pagkapanganak mo pa lang, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 1.

Magtapos ka lang ng grade three, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 2.

Bago matapos ang pagka-teenager mo, parehistro ka lang sa COMELEC, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 3.

‘Wag ka lang mag-ambisyon na mag-abroad, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 4.

At tumambay ka lang sa kanto hanggang tumanda ka, qualified ka na sa Criteria Number 5.

Kadali, ‘di ba?

Pero sa takbo ng situwayon ngayon dapat na yatang baguhin ang limang criteria na ito.

‘Eto na dapat:

“In order to serve as the President of the Philippines one…

“Must be a political clan member by birth or by ambition

“Must be able to hire  family members or family friends to read and write on his/her behalf

“Must be able to pay 200 to 500 pesos per registered voter to win.”

“Must return to the Philippines after spending half-a-lifetime abroad as a double-citizenship cardholder 10 years prior to the elections. Must also be able to flee to his/her mansions abroad during worst case scenarios.

“Must be a self-righteous, self-centered, stubborn adult who’s quite familiar with menopause, mid-life crises and showbusiness.

“And must be able to break Philippine laws and get away with it.”

 (photo from ryanericsongcanlas)

Oktubre 23, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 2 mga puna.

BAHA, BUBONG at BOBONG pulitiko

(ni Ely M.) TINA-type ko ito habang nakikinig sa OFW Secret RADYO .

Binaha ang Metro Manila today, September 26, 2008.

Maraming tao ay nasa bubong dahil lubog na ang mga bahay nila.

Lahat sila sumisigaw ng …

“Saklolo!”

AFP photo(AFP photo)

“Sagipin n’yo kami!”

from flicker3                                                                                 (photo from luisandthepolice@flicker)

“Malulunod na kami!”

from bostondotcom                                                                                                                  (from www.boston.com)

“Nagugutom na kami!”

from flicker2                                                (photo from mylesgj@flicker)

Sagot ng mga autoridad:

“Konti ang rubber boats natin– hindi kayang sagipin ang lahat.”

“Naka-deploy na lahat ng trucks– antabay lang po.”

“‘Wag kayong mag-attempt na lumusong para hindi kayo malunod.”

“Hindi kayo mamamatay sa gutom kung hanggang bukas.”

“Konting hintay lang at paumanhin po.”

Hanggang sa dumilim na.

Tigil daw muna ang rescue para sa ilang lugar.

“Paano kami kung isang dangkal na lang lubog na ang ulo namin sa baha…

…kahit nasa bubong na kami?” sigaw ng mga tao.

Walang sagot.

Si Baranggay Captain, walang sagot.

Si Mayor, walang sagot.

Si Governor, walang sagot.

Si Congressman, walang sagot.

Si Senador, walang sagot.

Si Presidente, walang sagot.

Walang sagot.

Lagot.

(simulan na ang sisihan)

Setyembre 26, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 6 mga puna.

IT’S so KORNY it’s FUNNY

 STRAIGHT from my Yahoo inbox. Isang email na nakapagpasaya sa araw ko.

THE MARK OF…

zorrolegendlogo

MISTER: “Kung gagawa ako ng pelikula, gusto ko, ako si ZORRO!”

MISIS: “Eh, ako, sino?”

MISTER: “Ikaw si DACOS!”

MISIS: “Dacos? Sino ‘yun?”

                                   MISTER: “DA COS of all my ZORROs!”

JOB INTERVIEW:

boss

BOSS: “Ano ba’ng alam mo?”

APLIKANTE: “Ah, eh… alam ko po kung saan kayo nakatira ng misis n’yo at kung saan nakatira ang kabit n’yo.”

BOSS: “Congratulations. Tanggap ka na!”

PROJECT

father and son

ANAK: “‘Tay, penge ng pera. May project kami, bibili ako ang ‘cocomban’.

TATAY: “Ano ka ba naman, anak. Hanggang ngayon ‘cocomban’ pa rin ang tawag mo.”

ANAK: “Ano po ba ang tama?”

TATAY: “Bomb paper.”

HEARING AID

OLD_MEN001

LOLO PEDRO: “Galing ako sa doktor. Nakabili na ako ng hearing aid. Grabe! Ang linaw ngayon ng pandinig ko!”

LOLO JUAN: “Wow! Galing! Magkano ang bili mo sa hearing aid?”

LOLO PEDRO: “Kahapon lang!”

PUSA

cat

MISIS: “Dear, iligaw mo nga itong pusa. Naka-sako na. Dalhin mo sa malayo.”

MISTER: “Okey, dear.”

(Pagkaraan ng anim na oras)

MISIS: “O, bakit ka ginabi? Nailigaw mo ba ‘yung pusa?”

MISTER: “Bwisit na pusang ‘yan! Kundi ko siya sinundan, ‘di na ko nakauwi.”

TATLONG TANGA, NAGSISIKSIKAN SA KAMA

guys bed

TANGA No. 1: “Pare, ‘di tayo kasya. Bawas tayo ng isa. Sa lapag na lang matulog.”

(Bumaba si TANGA No. 2)

TANGA No. 3: ‘”Ayan pare. Maluwag na. Akyat ka na dito!”

PUZZLE

puzzle

ELY: “Yahoo! Ang bilis kong nabuo ‘tong puzzle!”

JULIO: “Talaga? Gaano kabilis?”

ELY: “5 months!”

JULIO: “Ang tagal naman.”

ELY: “Matagal ba ‘yun? Eh, nakalagay nga rito sa kahon: ‘For 3 years and up!'”

KAPE

coffee-cartoon-copyright3

MISIS: “Ano ba’ng hinahanap mo riyan sa supot ng 3-in-1 coffee? Kanina ka pa silip nang silip diyan?”

MISTER: “Hinahanap ko ‘yung libreng asukal. Nakasulat kasi sa karton, ‘SUGAR FREE’!”

KABAYO

horse

PROCOPIO: “Sobrang tabatsoy ng misis ko kaya gusto niyang magbawas ng timbang. Nag-horseback riding siya.”

JACK: “Ano’ng resulta?”

PROCOPIO: “Nabawasan ng sampung kilo ‘yung kabayo!”

(visuals courtesy of google images)

Setyembre 23, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 3 mga puna.

P35 Lang ang Sweldo ng Isang Senador?!!

HINDI ako ang nagsulat nito.

Galing ito sa isang kaibigan ng kapitbahay ng pinsan ng kinakapatid ng katulong ng isang manunulat pampulitika. Sa sobrang dami ng pinagpasahan, nakalimutan na nga ang pangalan ang author. Eniwey, ang mensahe naman ang mas mahalaga. Ire-relay ko na lang nang buo.

At sabay-sabay tayong magmura sa ending.

telembang

MAGANDA rin naman ang naidudulot ng pagiging prangka ni Senador Miriam Defensor-Santiago. Sa isang episode ng Correspondents sa ABS-CBN sabi ni Senator Santiago, marami ang tumatakbong Senador dahil sa laki ng budget na ibinibigay sa kanila kada buwan.

Lumalabas na ang

P35,000 suweldo nila monthly ay pakitang-tao lang sa milyun-milyong budget ng bawat senador.

Ang totoo, kada buwan ay may

P2 Milyon Fixed Monthly Budget (meaning: panggastos) ang bawat Senador.

Para sa opisina pa lang nila ay humigit-kumulang na

P500,000 ang budget nila for Maintenance and Operating Expenses (Rental, Utilities, Supplies at Domestic Travels) at

P500,000 para sa Staff at Personal expenses (personal use, ‘eka nga). Kaya para makatipid ang ibang Senador, kaunti lang ang staff na kinukuha nila. Kadalasan mga kamag-anak din nila ito. Nagtataka ka pa kung bakit mayroong mga Ghost Employees?

Bukod diyan, may

P760,000 allowance pa sila kada buwan para naman sa Foreign Travel (biyaheng abroad for whatever dahil madali namang gumawa ng dahilan). At ang masakit pa nito, hindi na kailangang i-liquidate ang mga resibo ng mga gastusin ‘yan kundi Certification lang ang Requirement. Meaning OK lang kahit walang resibo.

Heto pa, lahat sila ay Chairman ng mga Komite sa Senado. Ang Committee Chairman ay tumatanggap din ng budget na sinlaki ng tinatanggap ng isang Senador na humigit-kumulang

 P1 Milyon din! — ahehe! Nadudoble ‘ika nga ‘pag chairman ka.

Hindi sila mawawalan ng Komite dahil 24 lang ang ating mga Senador at 37 naman ang Committee sa Senado. There’s food for everybody ‘ika nga! Lumalabas na doble ang kanilang benepesiyo at kita kapag sila ay nabiyayaan ng Committee Chairmanship.

P200 milyon ang Budget para sa Pork Barrel ng mga Senador bawat taon, awtomatikong may 10% na S..O.P. o kita ng Senador na

P20 milyon. Ito ang porsiyento na ibinibigay ng mga kontratista sa mga Senador na nagbibigay sa kanila ng mga Infrastructure at Livelihood Project.

Bago matapos ang termino ng isang Senador, kumita na siya ng

P100 milyon sa Pork Barrel pa lang. Yung ibang Senador mas gahaman, hindi lang 10% kundi 20 – 30% ang komisyon ang hinihingi sa mga kontratista. Ito rin ang dahilan kung bakit napakaraming palpak proyekto ang gobyerno. Naibibigay kasi lagi ang kontrata sa pinakabobong kontraktor na pinakamalaking maglagay.

Pansinin niyo na lang ang pagbabago ng buhay ng ilan sa ating mga Senador simula nang manungkulan sa puwesto. Kung dati ay simple lang ang kanilang pamumuhay ngayon ay nakatira na sila sa mga eksklusibong subdivision, maraming bahay sa Pilipinas at abroad at mahigit lima ang sasakyan.

Ngayon nagtataka ka pa ba kung bakit gumagastos ng daan-daang milyong piso ang mga Senador sa kampanya para sa isang posisyon na P35,000 lang ang suweldo kada buwan?

Bawing-bawi pala ang gastos kapag naupo na!

ANG SARAP MAGING SENADOR! ! ! ”

PLEASE COPY AND FORWARD to as many of your friends and let the whole country know na sa mga KUPAL lang napupunta ‘yung mga tax na kinakaltas sa suweldo natin tuwing kinsenas at katapusan.

Haaay, nako.

(telembangfrom)

Hunyo 18, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 6 mga puna.

Kuwentong Taho

taho_vendor

MERON akong kainuman. Kaka-promote lang niya sa trabaho. After five gruelling years, na-promote siya from a “taho-maker” to a  “taho-seller”. Big career leap for him dahil mula sa marumi at madilim na pabrika ng taho sa may Pasig, makakalabas na siya ngayon ng pabrika at masisikatan ng araw. With option to travel pa around Pasig, QC and San Juan. Maglalakad nga lang. Karga ‘yung balde ng taho, sago at arnibal.

Pero in the course of his conversation with Da Boss, ‘eto daw ang sinabi sa kanya–

“Tandaan mo iho, malaking promosyon ito para sa trabaho mo. Pero ‘wag kang umasang ‘andito ka sa pabrika ko habambuhay. Kaya pilitin mong matutuhan ang lahat nang dapat mong matutuhan. Balang-araw magagamit mo ito sa ibang paraan, sa ibang panahon… sa ibang trabaho.”

Kinabahan ang kainuman ko sa mga katagang iyon. Na-promote nga ba siya? O na-demote? O na-warning-an?

“… ‘wag kang umasang nandito ka sa pabrika ko habambuhay?… magagamit mo ito sa ibang trabaho?”– “What the hell does that mean?!”– sigaw niya in a mix of British and Bisayan twang habang kinakamot ang kanyang ulo… sa taas, ‘tapos ‘yung sa baba.

Kinabukasan maaga siyang pumasok. Kinuha ang kanyang brand new balde ng taho. Isinukbit iyun sa kaliwang bahagi ng bagong kinis na kawayan. Sa kanan naman, isinabit niya ang lalagyan ng arnibal, plastic cup at sago. Inilagay ang Sunshine White Towel sa kanyang leeg at isinuot ang baseball cap na may tatak na Nikee.

Taas noo siyang lumabas ng pabrika at naglakad papalayo.

Papalayo ng pabrika

Patungo sa istasyon ng bus pabalik sa Bicol.

Hindi na nga siya babalik.

At hindi na rin niya ibabalik sa may-ari ang mga taho container niyang bitbit.

(tahophoto)

Hunyo 14, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , , , . KUPAL nation. 2 mga puna.

Ano nga ba ang “KUPAL”?

smegma

(LJI)

Ano nga ba ang kupal?

Nag-search ako sa interweb at ito ang mga nakuha kong impormasyon:

Ayon sa www.urbandictionary.com and kupal ay

“tagalog word, meaning, a yellowish paste-like substance found inside the skin of an uncircumcised penis ”

or

“a term used to decribe an annoying, arrogant, stupid, dumb and/or foolish person.”

Anyway, for me, they are one and the same.

Parehong walang kwenta.

‘Yung una, walang kwentang tinga ng titi.

‘Yung pangalawa, walang kwentang tao sa mundo.

So, sila ‘yung ilan sa mga topic ng blog na ito– ‘yung mga entry na may TAG na ‘KUPAL Nation’, du’n natin sila idi-discuss.

Doon pag-uusapan ang mga kabuwisitan na gawa ng mga buwisit na tao.

At dito din natin sila bubuwisitin.

Dahil kupal silang lahat.

(drawingby)

Hunyo 14, 2009. Mga kataga , , , , . KUPAL nation. 11 mga puna.